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Love makes people do crazy things.
By BRIDES
Last updated on Oct 07, 2023
By Jillian Kramer
Cool, calm, and collected. Raise your hand if that's so not you when you're in love.
For you (and many others) being in love signals doing things that some people might even call cuckoo. "It's a simple math equation," relationship and etiquette expert April Masini explains. "When what you're willing to expend for someone or something is more or greater than your fear of being crazy, you'll do the crazy or be the crazy."
And here, according to our experts, are four such crazy things you might just do when you're crazy about someone.
Here are 4 insane, life-changing things only love can make you do:
1. Overcome a deep fear or phobia
Your relationship can take you to new heights figuratively. But if you've got a fear of floating above the clouds, being in love can take you to new heights literally, too. What gives? According to Kait Scalisi, intimacy and relationship coach and founder of Passion by Kait, it comes down to trust.
"Knowing you're with someone who has your back no matter what happens gives you the courage to try new things, even ones that you're terrified of," she explains. "You might still feel afraid, but you now have someone with you to assuage that fear, help you through, and comfort you if things do get bad."
Not only that but Rhonda Richards-Smith, LCSW, mental health and relationship expert, adds, "New love can spark a sense of bravery and determination." When you're in love, you have new motivation to confront and conquer old fears. "Falling in love can challenge and motivate us to do more than we ever thought possible," she says.
2. Ditch your friends for your partner
Before you met your match, you were always down for a night out on the town. But now? Not so much. As Scalisi explains, "When we're in your relationship or falling in love, we literally got tunnel vision to be with our partner and only our partner. Nothing else seems quite as important," says Scalisi. Thanks, hormones.
But while you'll surely miss time with your friends, Richards-Smith says it's not all bad. "New lovers may want to spend more time with one another at the expense of their friendships, but this can also take place when an individual does not feel their friends support their new romance," she says. "While it may seem crazy, eliminating toxic friendships can be a good thing for you and your relationship."
3. Change your go-to behaviors
The couple of friends who baby talk used to make you want to barf every time you overheard their sweet conversations. Yet, when you're the one in love, you may find yourself changing how you talk too, says Masini.
"Serious entrepreneurs start using baby talk," she says. "Women who felt political about body hair start waxing and buying incredible lingerie collections. You see all sorts of people in love doing flip-flops on their normal behavior simply because they care about what the person they love likes."
4. Make grand (embarrassing) gestures
You're not exactly in the habit of making a fool of yourself, and especially not in public. But when it comes to your mate, there's nothing you can't or won't do to make him or her smile, even if it means embarrassing yourself in the process.
"Take a flash mob proposal, for example," says Scalisi. "The person proposing probably shows their love in a little ways every day. But the proposal gives them a chance to really express their love and doing something that will bring tons of joy to their partner is a must-do, even if it means embarrassing themselves."
Not only does modesty often go out the window in order to make our significant others happy, but "we [also] tend to care less about the judgments of others," adds Richards-Smith, which means that making a fool of ourselves in the name of love even feels easier than before. "Avoiding public ridicule at all costs is often the norm, but falling in love can lead the most private person to make the most public declarations," she says.
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Jillian Kramer is an award-winning storyteller. She's been featured in Food and Wine, Glamour, SELF, Brides, and Women's Health Magazine.