The TRUTH About Zombieing (And Why It Hurts WAY More Than Ghosting)

I have never been a fan of ghosts, but hey, people die, what can you do? Zombies, though? Those things are NASTY!

The same can be said for the modern day trends of "ghosting" and "zombieing." 

Ghosting is NOT nice. I think it is rude and passive-aggressive and hurtful.

And I have totally done it myself and I understand the cowardly but real impulse to quietly pass on from the world of an unpromising relationship in blissfully silent peace.

The newly crowned tactic of zombieing, on the other, is exactly as it sounds. Messy, creepy and just plain ... ew.

According to the article in PrimeMind that first called out zombieing as a unsubtly subtle way of disrupting the feelings of someone who has already been ghosted: 

"To be zombied is to have someone you care about disappear from your life altogether only to have them bring a relationship back from the dead with an out-of-the-blue text or interaction on social media."

Salon explained how zombie behavior manifests as follows: "Zombieing typically starts with a feeler message such as a like on Facebook or social media, and is usually followed up with by a dumb message or text like “Hey” or an inane observation. 'Yes, Mr. Zombie, I am aware of the fact that it’s spring. Thanks for the update, but you can crawl back under a rock now.'"

Not that there is anything new about this behavior, really.

I was discussing male/female dynamics with a guy friend recently. My bud was saying that he finds it silly that when things end romantically between a man and a woman, the woman will often send messages along the lines of, "You'll see! You'll miss me! One day soon you're going to realize that I was the best thing you ever had!"

While I agreed with him that this is perhaps not the most mature way to handle oneself, there is a simple, factual explanation for it.

They always come back.

Ask any woman you know. It's just true. 

Social media has made returning from the relationship dead easier than ever.

It isn't wise to lurk on your ex's Facebook,Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat (pick your own social media poison), but it is an extremely difficult temptation to resist.

Throw in a dash of heartache and a pinch of selective memory, and a double tap to like or love a new photo is just one ounce of zombie flesh away at any given moment.

The moral of this ghost story?

No one likes a zombie, but there is little you can do to stop them from trying to eat a bit of your brains at some point. It's what they do.

Shake yourself awake. Remember it was all a bad dream. And keep on moving.