13 Romantic Lines From Classic Literature Written For Tinder

Romantic classic + Tinder = hilarious hot mess.

By Iva-Marie Palmer — Written on Aug 12, 2021

Photo: Alena Ozerova / Shutterstock

So, here's a line: "In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you."

Sound familiar? You might remember it as something Colin Firth uttered, playing a hunky Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice (based on the book by Jane Austen, so maybe get on that if you haven't read it).

I tried to imagine how this line might be revisited if it were done through texting. Here's what I came up with: "I am SO HARD right now. HBU?"

Yeah, we think Jane Austen was all about tea time and propriety and good matches, but I think she would've found this age of romance via text and Tinder rife with opportunities to make funny.

I mean, it's funny because it's TRUE.

So, I took some more lines from classic romances and Tinder and text-ified them for modern audiences. Some of these borrow from real-life texts friends have sent or received, and some are adaptations of things I saw on the Instagram accounts Tinder Nightmares and Texts from Your Ex. (In some cases, I didn't change a word because the real thing was GOLD. I marked those.)

Check them out (and send me more lines to text or Tinder-fy if you're interested):

1. "The more I know of the world, the more I am convinced that I shall never see a man whom I can really love. I require so much!" -Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen

Tinderfied: "He hates brunch. Big no."

2."You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope ... I have loved none but you." -Persuasion by Jane Austen

Tinderfied: "DTF? (U R the only person I asked that today)"

3. "Men outlive their love, but they don't outlive the consequences of their recklessness." -Middlemarch by George Eliot

Tinderfied: "Um, can you delete that photo of my junk? All the photos of my junk?"

4. "She hates everything that is not what she longs for." -Adam Bede by George Eliot

Tinderfied: "Eek. I meant to swipe left."

5. "He's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same." -Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

Tinderfied: "He sent me a photo of his d*ck and I wasn't unimpressed."

6. "I would always rather be happy than dignified." -Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë

Tinderfied: "I'm pretty sure I peed myself when I saw you." (Note: this is a real Tinder response)

7. "Good night, good night! parting is such sweet sorrow / That I shall say good night till it be morrow." -Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

Tinderfied: "Talk later?"

8. "Love moderately. Long love doth so. / Too swift arrives as tardy as too slow." -Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

Tinderfied: "Girl on Tinder, in this town I'm stuck. We should meet up so that we can f*ck." (Note: this is a real Tinder response)

9. "Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?" -Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

Tinderfied: "It's been three days since I texted you and I know you're not dead. Please f*ck off."

10. "What's in a name? That which we call a rose / By any other name would smell as sweet." -Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

Tinderfied: "I'll tell you my real name when I’m more sure you're not a creep. For now, it's Mandy."

If 13 Romantic Lines From Classic Literature Were Written For Tinder

Romantic classic + Tinder = hilarious hot mess.