We are like the Brady Bunch, only with cats!
By Christine Schoenwald — Written on Feb 25, 2015
When I first met Andy on an online dating site, we both mentioned that we liked cats. There was nothing on either of our profiles that not loving cats was a deal-breaker. But the truth is that I would never be in a serious relationship with someone who didn't like animals and neither would he. I have friends who are intensely anti-pet, and I try not to hold it against them (but secretly I do.)
When Andy and I moved in together there was no question that he'd bring his cat and I'd bring mine; it was like the Brady Bunch-only with cats. Kitties have always been part of the equation with us, and loving cats is something that binds us together. I can't see a life without Andy or without cats.
Currently we have two gray inside cats, Yoshi and Allie, and a number of feral/stray cats that we feed outside. Our behind-the-house neighbors continued to get more and more cats—refusing to get them spayed and neutered. After the third cycle of kittens, we took it upon ourselves to get those cats fixed. Some of these neighbor cats never left—maybe because we not only feed them, we make sure they're comfortable outside with blankets and towels that I wash weekly.
We don't want to get too attached to the outdoor cats so only Sixties Cat, Gaucho, Randy and Berkeley have names. I know we have a reputation around the neighbor as having a house full of cats, but technically we only have the two inside cats. Just the two cats—all you cat-haters!
I'm not the cat lady; Andy and I are the "Cat Couple." If taking care of both the inside and outside cat communities makes us a crazy cat couple, then we'll own it. Besides it has been proven that spending time with cats (okay all pets) makes you happy, and that pet owners are less likely to suffer from depression and anxiety. And let's not forget the physical health benefits that come from being a family with felines such as lowering blood pressure and pulse rates.
8 Reasons being kitteh obsessed works for us.
1. We're cat-whisperers.
We know how to talk to cats and how to interpret the sounds they make. It's easy to tell the difference between Yoshi's I'm going to vom meow with his No one is paying any attention to me yowl. This gift helps us to communicate with each other too. We're great at picking up on non-verbal communication and we always greet each other as enthusiastically as we do with our cats, though usually not with our butts up in the air.
2. We don't have to be together all the time.
Like cats, we are able to enjoy some alone time. If he wants to go to yet another 3D version of the Hobbit that I have no interest in seeing, then I wish him well and will find something to do on my own—like a cat-nap.
3. We have our own cat language.
We don't just clean the litter boxes, we do poop-patrol, by having to carry large bags of dry food Andy has "Cat-Food Arms" and when we have an extended petting session with one of the cats—it's called an affection session.
4. We ultimately have the same taste in home décor.
Although Andy's taste runs more modern, and mine more Arts-and-Crafts, we meet in the middle as our house is also heavily decorated in the style of "cat comfort." Recently we dragged into the dining room an old kitty condo (so old that’s dusty) and, let's face it, a disgusting eyesore, but Yoshi enjoys sleeping on it when the sun shines on him from the window, so it stays. Andy and I can look at an empty Amazon box and not see it as something that immediately needs to be recycled, but as a fun place for the cats to either play or sleep in. There's an abundance of good sleeping places, but all plastic is hidden so that Yoshi won't eat it.
5. The most important rule in our relationship isn't "thou shall not cheat" or "never go to bed angry," it's "don't disturb the cat."
If one of the cats is comfortable on the bed, couch or anywhere, it's our job as their main human to do anything within our power to not move them, even if it means having to do every kind of maneuver known to man to extricate ourselves from the position that we're in and not wake them. I haven't done back-bends since high school, but if it means Allie doesn't have to lose any sleep, then I will contort like a circus freak. Cats have priority over our comfort.
6. If we weren't together we might be considered a crazy cat lady and a crazy cat man, but joined we can be considered as people who like cats avoiding the "crazy" label.
Besides isn't the formula of crazy catitude the number of cats divided by number of the humans equals crazy or not crazy. Therefore 2 divided by 2 =we're not cray cray for kitties.
7. We always have something to talk about.
Is Allie less of a biter than she used to be or does Yoshi like his new healthy food? Has Yoshi finally stopped sitting on top of the front door when it's open? Parents have a lot of stuff to discuss and cat-parents do, too. We don't stay angry at each other. If Allie has some mystery gunk on her back or if Yoshi is posing as if he's shooting downhill on a bobsled, how could I not want to share it with Andy?
8. Any cat custody battle would be ugly.
Yoshi may favor Andy this month, but there's no way I'd allow him to live with Andy over me—and same goes for Allie. Nope, we could never come to an agreement when it came to dividing up the cats. I guess we’ll have to stay together forever then.