Love, Heartbreak

10 Reasons To Give Up On Men And Become A Lesbian

Photo: WeHeartIt
Give up on men become a lesbian

As a bisexual woman, I spend a lot of time considering the positive and negative qualities of both men and women. Each group has their pros and cons, but there are definitely some days when guys become such a hassle that I think, "Screw it, it's girls only for me from now on." 

If we're being honest, all of us women have those days. When we've been burned one time to many by men and we've said, maybe even jokingly, how much easier it would be to become a lesbian and never have to deal with them again. 

You might be thinking, but wait! It doesn't work that way! You're either gay or straight, and as Lady Gaga famously sang, you were Born That Way. But a recent study from the Essex University psychology department said that while straight men are straight, no question, heterosexual women — whatever we ourselves might think — are always secretly attracted to their own sex, too.

That's right! According to the study, all women are either gay or bisexual, but NEVER straight. 

So without further ado, here at the 10 reasons giving up on men and becoming a lesbian isn't such a bad idea.

1. Guys can be absolutely exhausting.

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Guys call women high-maintenance, and a great many of us are, but we aren't the only ones who take a lot of work. And frankly, it's easier for us to put up with another woman's needs than a man's, largely because we understand them better. 

2. Guys don't know a woman's body as well as another woman does.

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Understandable, considering they are of the opposite sex and all, but still, sometimes it's nice to be with someone who knows the owner's manual. 

3. Guys aren't as complex as us.

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Don't get me wrong; I'm not saying that men are stupid. Far from it. But emotionally, women are much more complicated creatures, and we understand each other better than a man does. 

4. Guys think it’s okay to send texts like these:

Texts men send

5. Guys can be super gross.

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A lot of men don't seem to comprehend how much women like cleanliness. (Hint: WE LOVE IT!!!). So clean those damn ears and put on a fresh shirt, or we're all gonna go play for the other team. Added bonus of being with a woman? No facial hairs coating the bathroom sink. Yuck. 

6. Guys can totally knock us up.

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No one wants a surprise pregnancy. No one. And with a woman, there is zero chance of our lives being suddenly and drastically altered. 

7. Guys are useless in the fashion department.

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We can't take you shopping, you don't know designers, and you have no idea about trends. Besides, if a girl looks fat in something, a woman will find a sweet, gentle way to tell you, and then propose an alternate outfit. Win!

8. Guys have genitals that are a serious hassle.

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There is literally no way we can choke on a woman's nether regions. Penises, on the other hand, are a whole other ball game. We never know when they are gonna explode in our faces or jolt down our throats. And don't even get me started on how little we want to handle your balls. 

9. Guys don't look nearly as cute as girls on the dance floor.

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This one's just science, really. Girls are one thousand times cuter when we're gyrating and writhing around. I know you fellas are giving it your all, but it's much more fun to watch a girl dance.  I think we can all agree on that one. 

10. It's massively more fun to flirt with another woman.

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Mainly because we look like this while we do it:

Bonus: In that same vein, we are so much prettier when we orgasm

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Who wouldn't want to look at this?