What Women Really Think ... Of Dating Someone Who's Sober

woman drinking wine

As someone who drinks more than she should and is well aware that there just might be a problem here, I have tried more than a few times to get sober. I don't mean just for a few weeks, but it never works out. Alcohol is my crutch and I know that. I've gotten a far as a few months, and while I'm proud of that achievement, I can't be too proud, because I still drink, and I still love it.

Because I am a drinker, I've often wondered if I could be in a relationship with someone who doesn't drink at all. I have several friends who are sober and they're just as awesome off the sauce as they were when they were on it, but I also feel like certain events are reserved for them and others reserved for my drinking buddies. Which makes sense; friends do get divvied up into specific categories depending on their interests.

I asked both sober and drinking ladies their thoughts on dating someone whose drinking habits (or non-drinking habits) are completely different from their own. Here's what they had to say.

How The Drinkers Feel:
"I could never date a sober person. It's just like someone refusing to partake in one of my favorite hobbies!" exclaims Rachel, 21.

"I married a sober person and it's perfect since forever. I always have a designated driver," says Joy, 37.

"Whether they drink a lot, a little or not at all doesn't bother me. As long as they don't care that I may have a couple, we'll get along just fine," says Jen, 36.

"I'd be apprehensive but I don't know that it's a dealbreaker," says Sarah, 26.

"For me, dating someone who doesn't drink is like dating someone who votes Republican. It just won't work," says Leigh, 27.

"As someone that enjoys drinking, I probably feel most comfortable either with someone that drinks a similar amount, or a sober person that is VERY patient and still fun around drunkies. Nothing is worse than the sober person that is constantly judging you, and it's also no fun to have to take care of someone that is stupidly drunk ALL THE TIME (making me the responsible party by default)," says Becky, 29.

How The Sober Ladies Feel:
"As someone sober, I've been fine with being with drinkers so long as it's not constant and excessive, and so long as it's kept out of my home. I have some wine around for cooking, but it has taken me a long time to get to that point. What makes me really uncomfortable is when people who know about it bring over bottles of wine or liquor when they come over for an evening." says Tanya, 34.

"My husband and I are both sober; before we met each other, we hadn't dated anyone else who was sober. But a guy broke up with me once because I had stopped drinking, I lost friends when I stopped drinking, and it made me sad, because I'm way more fun now than I was when I was drunk," says Randi, 35.

"I've worked extremely hard at my sobriety. It's been six years in the making. But since I know I have a problem, I know that dating someone who drinks would be an issue. If they occasionally had a glass of wine with dinner, that would be OK, but more than that, I just couldn't do it. I need to put myself first for this one," says Kim, 30.


How do you feel about dating someone who's sober? Tell us in the comments below.