I Wasn't Jewish Enough: How Religion Ended My Relationship

I never thought I'd be the type of woman to date a religious guy.

A Reform Jew by upbringing, my family ate bagels, lox, and pickled herring on Sundays, lit our Menorah every Hanukkah, and sat through services on the High Holy Days. I learned how to pronounce the word afikomen. My mom referred to my face as a beautiful punim and hoped that someday I would meet a nice mensch and get married. Throughout elementary and middle school, I attended Hebrew school, but mostly for the social rather than the religious aspect. The most exciting part of my Bat Mitzvah, I'm ashamed to admit, was the lavish reception I had in my temple's ballroom complete with street dancers, a DJ, and gourmet buffet. After I had opened the last of my Bat Mitzvah gifts, I left organized Judaism to pursue more free-spirited religious activities of the bohemian/New Age persuasion. It wasn't that I stopped believing in the Jewish faith—though I'm not sure I ever completely bought the doctrine—it was just that it never moved me.

As I got older I found that I preferred to be spiritual privately and only in ways I chose at moments I chose. An empty religious practice is just that to me—empty. I prefer to receive my messages from God by way of iPod shuffle or the beautiful pattern on peacock feathers. I've heard God's voice at unexpected moments; in yoga class, while listening to music, practicing meditation, reading poetry, picnicking in Paris, or while running a half marathon. I believe in synchronicity, I know there is some sort of greater order and purpose to life and I connect with that higher power in my own ways. Post-college, I fully adopted this practice of Spiritual Eclecticism. Don't worry if you've never heard of it, it's a religion of my own invention. It is a conglomeration of rituals that resonate with Me. I use anything I find useful and toss the rest.

Read the rest on The Frisky: Dealbreaker: I Wasn’t Jewish Enough

Written by Ami Angelowicz

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This article was originally published at The Frisky. Reprinted with permission from the author.