Are Women Too Insecure To Have Sober Sex?

A recent study tries to convince us. We aren't buying it, though.

drinking on a date

The Daily Mail released another one of their sensational studies yesterday. This time the researchers cast their glare to women, drinking and their ability (or lack thereof) to have sex sober. "One in 20 women has NEVER had sex sober as they lack body confidence" screams the headline. Sober Dating: How To Date Without Drinking

According to a study of 3, 000 women aged 18-50, the average chick has had sex with over half of their sexual partners while drunk. On at least two occasions said ladies haven't remembered the name of the guy lying next to them. But keep in mind, the average number of sex partners amongst this pool is "8," so it isn't as if these numbers are staggering. An extra Pinot Noir with dinner certainly isn't turning this sample set into booze-drenched harlots.


The article goes on to say that three-quarters claim to feel more relaxed and able to "let their hair down" after a few cocktails. Four out of 10 have been tipsy when sleeping with someone for the first time. The Smoking-Hot Reason To Avoid First-Date Sex

This is what we like to call "The Sky Is Blue" news. Recovering alcoholics and teetotalers aside, most of us douse ourselves in alcohol during the early parts of courtship. Of course the amount varies, as does one's relationship with the substance, but as those abstaining from booze have noted—dating without it is awkward. In the same way dancing becomes easier once you've had a cocktail or two. Not that we need alcohol, mind you, but its a familiar crutch that doesn't have to signify a big problem like the Mail is suggesting.


The fact alcohol plays an integral role in their love lives shows that women are looking for a boost in self-esteem when it comes to their bedroom antics. Whilst many women claim they only drink before sex because it is part of the dating process, a large percentage will actually refuse to get between the sheets without a bit of Dutch courage. But in doing so many women will be losing self control and this is when drunken one-night stands are more likely to occur.

It seems as if we are talking about two different things here. Refusing to have sex unless you are drunk, yes, indicative of a problem. But really no different then refusing to have sex with the lights on for instance. Then again, people are victims of habits. A few glasses of wine before sex may feel as natural as washing your hands after using the bathroom, for example.

While some may drink to alleviate mild insecurity, and yes it certainly can make people more likely to strip it off and get nasty, we aren't so certain this means women as a whole are too shy and timid to have sex sober. How does one explain morning sex then? Still running off the fumes from the night before?

Yes, all of us at one point have fallen victim to beer goggles, without a doubt, but how many times have we all gone to dinner, split a bottle of wine, endured a mediocre kiss and decided, eh, not for me. How To Kiss Well