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No Happily-Ever-After Pt. 2

No Happily-Ever-After Pt. 2

Their relationship never really matured past the emotional or psychological level just discussed. A year went by under the same circumstances (good period-fight-breakup-good period, major blowup, breakup, etc) and then he moved to a different state for business. They kept the long distance relationship barely alive for several months. Every once and a while I would get an update about their relationship but it began to take an emotional toll on me. My friend and I have slow began to lose touch with each other. She became more reclusive and I became more disinterested in the only thing she wanted to ever talk about: HIM and they ever-growing, dysfunctional relationship. She would snoop through his phone and hack into his email; always suspicious and accusing him of cheating. [I’ve said time and time again: Never snoop through other people’s things. Texts and emails can so easily be misinterpreted. Besides the fact that if you are so gung-ho on catching someone in a lie, then why are you with that person in the first place?]

Last I heard, (through a mutual friend) their relationship is playing out like another chapter of He’s Just Not That Into You. He is officially ‘single’ according to Facebook. They still keep in touch via the internet, texts or the occasional phone call but he has made it pretty crystal clear that he does not want to be in a relationship and that he is exhausted by all the arguing. She is still graveling to save the relationship and her mental state is spiraling out of control almost to the point where my other friends are concerned for her or maybe even his well being. [I jokingly brought up the news story from a couple years ago about the crazy, female astronaut that drove from Texas to Florida nonstop in a diaper to confront the guy she was infatuated with. I chuckle now but actually witnessing the crazy transformation of my friend is prompting me to relate.]

So it brings me back to my question: What can be done to bring my friend back down to Earth and move on from this toxic relationship? I’m hoping that eventually he will quit being cruel and cut her off completely. He is participating in the madness by lingering in and out of her life and contacting her only when it’s convenient for HIM. The best medicine is to preoccupy yourself with activities (ie work, church, shopping, Girls-Night-Out) so that you can eliminate the ability to let your mind wander. Get all dolled up and hit the social scene. My friend is in no way ready to jump into a relationship with another man but it will only take the attention (or even flirtatious glance) of one good looking guy for her to bounce back to the real world and forget all about Mr. In-the-Past


Expert advice

Save your breath because you only need two words to make him commit.
Are you REALLY thinking about their happiness?
If you keep finding yourself in heartbreaking, dead end relationships, listen up.
It seems like you can't do anything right.

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