12 Ways To Build Confidence In Your Relationship

Even the most rock-solid couples feel insecure about their relationships sometimes. As part of our Irresistible You survey, we asked readers to fill in the blank: "I have the most confidence in my relationship when my partner/spouse ___________."

The top two most popular answers were "compliments me/tells me how he or she feels about me" and "really listens to me/gives me his or her full attention."

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So, how do you build confidence in your relationship? We asked our experts to weigh in with their best suggestions, and here's what they had to say:

1. Get in the present. On a daily basis, take time for yourself to clear your mind and set your intention for how you will be in your relationship. Repeat positive affirmations that reinforce the feelings that you want to feel. —Lisa L. Payne

2. Get real. Take stock of your relationship as it is and identify the wonderful things that you are already experiencing, as well as concrete examples of things you would like to improve. Express gratitude for your blessings every day and know that you have the power to respond with love in all other areas and exercise your power to create a life that excites you. —Lisa L. Payne

3. Get over it. Ask yourself why you have allowed your confidence to falter in this relationship. Is it possible that you sabotage your relationship with negative patterns of behavior driven by a little but loud voice that says you aren't worthy of love? Acknowledging limiting beliefs is important, but so is learning to let them go. —Lisa L. Payne

4. Get clear. Clarity breeds confidence, while fear and doubt threaten your self-esteem. See yourself in the relationship of your dreams and imagine all you want is possible. —Lisa L. Payne

5. Get engaged. While this may be a side-effect of your newfound confidence, this step is really about engaging yourself in a commitment to create a life that excites you. Make a declaration because you are worthy of having a loving and fulfilling relationship. Believe that you have the capacity to love and be loved. —Lisa L. Payne

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