How To Make An Effective Apology

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How To Make An Effective Apology [EXPERT]
5 tips to let someone you love know you're really, really sorry.

When I wake up in the morning, one of the first things I do is read the news. Often, a politician or celebrity is apologizing. Whether it was Chris Brown for his behavior on Good Morning America, Kristen Stewart for cheating on her boyfriend Robert Pattison or Tiger Woods for his affairs with multiple women. With online traffic increasing dramatically to websites, such as theperfectapology.com and imsorry.com, apologizing is in fashion.

Obviously, the word "sorry" does not quite cut it if you have intentionally slept with your best friend's boyfriend or accidentally run over their pet. On the other hand, if you canceled dinner plans with a friend because you've been asked on a hot date or you accidentally missed your son's football game, "sorry" is your only way out. How I Learned To Love Myself ... And You Can, Too!

There is an art to a proper apology. Research has shown that apologizing in a heartfelt way can help you to reduce stress and alleviate guilt. Here are five simple steps to help you apologize:

1. Take responsibility. Know that if someone is upset with you, it is likely for a good reason. Take the time to reflect on what you might have done to upset them. If you haven't done anything wrong, then don't apologize. But, if you have, proceed to step two.

2. Apologize immediately. If you have done something inappropriate, don't try to justify your position in your mind. Let the other person know immediately that you didn't mean to upset them. Ideally, doing this face-to-face is most powerful or by phone if they live far away. Avoid doing it in an email or through Facebook. 3 Ways Kristen Stewart Can Make A Comeback

3. Acknowledge they are upset. Be clear about what you are sorry about. Acknowledge how your lack of awareness has upset them. If you need to explain yourself, only do it to show that you didn't mean to upset them. Do not try to bring out the pity card, make yourself feel better or to wiggle yourself out of making the apology. 

4. Ask for forgiveness. When you ask for forgiveness, let them know that you will not do it again. If they do accept your apology, say thank you and move on. Why You Should Forgive Your Cheating Ex

5. Forgive yourself. If they don't accept your apology, then there is nothing more you can do. Whether they do or don't accept your apology, you must let it go. Guilt is only going to harm you internally, so forgive yourself.

More love advice from YourTango Experts: 

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Sophie Keller

Author

Happiness expert and best selling author Sophie Keller appears regularly on Fox, NBC, ABC, CBS and on KTLA 5 Morning News. Her books include How Happy is Your Love Life? 50 Great Tips to Help You Attract and Keep your Perfect Partner. How Happy is Your Home? 50 Great Tips to Bring More Health, Wealth and Joy in to Your Home.  How Happy is Your Health? 50 Great Tips to Help You Live a Long, Happy and Healthy Life. And How Happy is Your Marriage? 50 Great Tips to Make Your Relationships Last Forever.  Sophie writes regularly for The Huffington Post, she was 'Good News' Ambassador for LG Electronics, is an Ambassador for Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution and has been featured in many magazines including Self, Healthy Living and Women's World. Sophie has also created a workbook and guided meditation for women who have lost babies during or just after pregnancy called  Healing After Miscarriage

You can join the bimonthly newsletter and find out about Sophie Keller's events at www.howhappyis.com. Follow Sophie on twitter at Sophie_Keller and join the conversation on Happiness on the How Happy is Facebook page. The daily tips and advice can only help you to become happier.  

Location: Santa Monica, CA
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