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Oral sex is a highly intimate sex act. Many people find oral sex to be way more intimate than intercourse. Perhaps this is because oral sex triggers a lot of feelings of vulnerability, and it's emotionally intense to let someone so close to your most sensitive parts. Yet, oral sex remains as one of the most pleasurable and orgasmic sex acts there is, so learning how to enjoy it fully—either giving or receiving—is an essential step in loving your sex life and making sure it’s as wonderful as it can be.
Oral sex positions do a lot more than create specific angles and access to sensitive spots; they communicate your feelings and excitement about receiving it.
Oral sex is a way to show you and your partner’s vulnerabilities and can create an intense connection between the two of you. Finding out the best way to pleasure your partner and even the best way for you to receive pleasure is a key step in enjoying the process and eliminating any uncertainty or discomfort.
In researching our book, The Pleasure Mechanics Guide To Cunnilingus, we surveyed thousands of men and women about what they find sexiest about oral sex. The overwhelming response was that those giving oral sex want their lovers to demonstrate their enthusiasm and excitement by participating.
This counts for both giver and receiver because as it turns out, the biggest turn-off was if they were giving oral sex to someone who stayed still and silent. Yeesh. No one wants that!
Exploring new oral sex positions can help you open up channels to communicate your pleasure and arousal while receiving, and make giving oral pleasure a lot more fun, too. Here are a few positions to experiment with as you lean back and enjoy the pleasures of oral sex.
Here are 11 of the hottest oral sex positions you and your partner can try for ultimate pleasure!
1. The Classic
The classic oral sex position for women receiving cunnilingus is a classic for a reason. One of the reasons oral sex is so pleasurable is due to the opportunity to lie back, relax and receive pleasure. Getting comfortable in bed and allowing your lover to lavish you with pleasure is a delicious and simple position.
You can experiment with a few modifications to make this classic oral sex position even more pleasurable.
- Don't make your lover suffocate under the sheets while going down on you. Throw off the covers and allow your lover to breathe freely while pleasuring you. The bonus? You get to feast your eyes on your hot lover in between your thighs. Make it even more intimate by making eye contact as your lover continues to pleasure you.
- Place a pillow under your hips to elevate your pelvis, giving your lover a bit more breathing room. Experiment with two or three pillows to gain more height. This position is also ideal for adding in fingering techniques to oral sex, a sure-fire way to maximize your orgasmic potential and hit all your pleasure zones at once.
- Plant your feet on the mattress, allowing you to push off your feet and move your hips. This can be your first step in becoming a more active receiver during oral sex. By shifting your hips a little up and down, or to the right and left, you can help your lover's tongue find your most sensitive spots. Once you gain more confidence and are ready to go wild, try moving your hips in circles to maximize your pleasure.
- Adapt the classic oral sex position by wrapping your legs around your lover's shoulders. This can be slightly acrobatic, so try it for short bursts and see how you feel in this position. Wrapping your legs around your lover's shoulders is a way of communicating your enthusiasm and excitement during oral sex, and your lover may enjoy feeling the skin of your legs and thighs. Remember that enthusiasm while receiving oral sex is infinitely sexy; by offering yourself up and clutching your lover's head between your thighs, you're participating more fully, and communicating your desire and excitement for oral stimulation.
If you want to take control of your pleasure and give your lover an overwhelming experience, try queening, which is also known as facesitting. Like a true queen, you take your throne by sitting on your lover's face.
Get your lover comfortable lying down in bed and then kneel over them, presenting your most intimate parts for them to pleasure. You can kneel up or down in order to control how much they can reach you, move your hips for your own pleasure, and even experiment with engulfing their face in your flesh for short, intense bursts.
Don't be shy about suggesting this position; many guys fantasize about this experience and think it's a total turn-on. Queening is truly an empowering experience, so if you're ready to claim your erotic power and beauty, assume the throne.
3. Doggy style
Ready to get primal? Get on all fours and allow him to stimulate you while you move and rock your hips. He can either be totally behind you if you're comfortable with his face so close to all your parts, or he can lie down and use his mouth around your clitoris. Enhance the primal experience of this position by making lots of noise, expressing your pleasure with moans, groans and even growls.
4. Recline and receive
If you have a comfortable recliner or reading chair, try putting a pillow on the floor in front of you, scooting to the edge of the chair and inviting your partner to kneel in front of you. This can also work on the edge of a bed. Inviting your lover to kneel in front of you and perform oral sex is a delicious way to allow them to worship your lovely body.
Related: What Couples Who Are KILLING It In The Bedroom Do (That You DON'T)
For the best oral sex positions for blowjobs, try these:
1. The Classic
The classic oral sex position for men is very similar to the classic oral sex position for women. Guys get to lie back, relax and enjoy all of the pleasure of fellatio. This position is great for the giver as well because it allows the giver to control the depth and speed of penetration. This position works well for an oral quickie when you're using oral stimulation as part of foreplay. But if you want to make oral sex last a long time, this position isn't the best choice.
The downside to the classic oral sex position for men is that the giver has to support their body weight, which usually means losing the ability to use their hands as part of the erotic stimulation. Hands are an essential part of giving great oral sex to a man, so freeing up the hands is a great reason to explore new oral sex positions.
2. Standing up
One great oral sex position that frees up the giver's hands is having the man stand up while the giver sits on the side of the bed or on a low chair. The giver can also kneel in front of the man, using a pillow to be more comfortable. Sitting is more comfortable than kneeling for most people.
Receiving oral sex while standing up opens up a few great pleasure benefits. Most importantly, the giver uses their hands to add more stimulation to oral sex. Using hand job techniques during oral sex allows complete stimulation of the entire penis while taking the pressure off the giver to take the entire length of their lover's shaft into their mouth.
Standing also allows the man to move his hips, which a lot of guys find highly pleasurable. Explore allowing him to move his hips gently to add more sensation while receiving.
Irrumatio is a Latin term to describe oral sex where the receiver thrusts into the mouth of the giver. While this term has some negative associations, consensual irrumatio can be incredibly hot and is worth trying out. With the receiver kneeling or sitting comfortable, the giver takes control and thrusts into the giver's receptive mouth.
Trust and communication are essential here. The man must exercise enough self-control to keep the thrusting comfortable and pleasurable for his lover, while the receiver must stay relaxed and receptive enough to receive the thrusts. If you want to try irrumatio, we recommend having a hand signal in place to communicate if the thrusts ever get too deep or too fast. This oral sex position can be wildly thrilling for both partners if done with respect and awareness.
4. Head off the bed
If you want to explore deeper oral penetration, try the "head off the bed" position. The giver reclines on the bed with their head off the edge, so the neck is bent backward. This position lines up the mouth and the throat, allowing deeper penetration with less gagging.
The trick here is getting the height right. The guy needs to be able to line up with the head without stretching or squatting. You can also try this oral sex position while lying on a dining room table or even a pool table. Remember, deep throating is a very advanced skill and won't be pleasurable or comfortable for everyone, so go slowly with exploring this position and make sure you're both enjoying it.
5. The Throne
While there's no male equivalent for the queening position, men deserve to feel like royalty, too. Receiving oral sex while seated in a comfortable chair, his lover kneeling in front of him, is perhaps the closest men can feel to sitting on a throne. Make it even more special by allowing him to watch a sports game, porn or another video of choice. Or put a special drink in his hand, or light a cigar before going down.
The goal is to add extra sensual pleasures while giving the guy great head. Save this as a once in a while treat to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries or other important achievements, and you'll have him looking forward to it all year long.
For the best oral sex positions for simultaneous oral sex, try these:
We all know the classic 69 position, but very few people can actually reach orgasm in this position. One of the greatest things about oral sex is taking turns. One person gets to totally relax and receive, and the other person can focus on giving as much pleasure as possible. 69 can be really distracting, and most people just end up moaning and gasping rather than focusing on giving.
Try the 67 position: the giver on top of the receiver, but with their body off to the side a bit. This way, you can enjoy the full body contact of having your lover on top of you while you're being pleasured, but without the distraction of having to give at the same time.
2. 69, on your sides
If you really want to explore the 69 position, try it with both of you lying on your sides. This prevents one of you from having to support your weight while hovering over your lover's body. Each of you can drape one leg over the other's shoulder to create access for oral stimulation.
Side-lying 69 can be very slow and luxurious. Try taking turns: one of you stimulates the other for a few moments and then switch roles. 69 is overwhelming for many people, as it's hard to focus on giving and receiving all at the same time. But it's also thrilling, so try it out once in a while to add variety.
Exploring new oral sex positions can open up new pleasures for both you and your lover. Remember, the sexiest qualities during oral sex are confidence and enthusiasm.
Each new oral sex position gives you permission to express yourself in a new way, showing your lover how much you're enjoying their generous oral stimulation. The sexiest oral sex position is the one that allows you to fully enjoy your lover's stimulation, so explore them all and find your personal favorites.