Are You REALLY Ready For A Relationship? Find Out!


If you think you're ready to ditch the single life, this video is for YOU.

Like many other single people, if you're attracted to the headline of this video, the gong to find a new love is ringing in your ears.

You're tired of sleeping alone, dining alone and maybe just tired of being alone. But are you really READY for someone new to enter your life?

There are many aspects of a new relationship that some people simply aren't ready for. Unfortunately, these challenging moments don't always surface until the relationship ends sourly. If you're unsure about your status and what's really going on inside, consider the following scenarios:

  • Perhaps one partner is emotionally unavailable or unable to devote enough quality time to the relationship? 
  • Maybe you're carrying heartache from past lovers or other baggage that's preventing you from trusting a potential mate.
  • Or maybe you're thinking, Oh, they're all the same. He's just going to hurt me just like the other ones! Why should I allow more heartache into my life?

How can tell if the time is right to step into new relationship waters and put all this behind you to mentally prepare for a life with your actual soulmate?

Host and YourTango Experts SVP Melanie Gorman sat down with individual and relational recovery therapist Argie Spuck, premarital, marital and infidelity counselor Dr. Jim Walkup, psychologist Dr. Stan Tatkin and couple therapist and author Dr. Colene Sawyer Schlaepfer to discuss the importance of preparing yourself for a serious romantic relationship.

Here are two life-changing ways to prepare for a new, loving relationship and keep it strong once you find it:

1. Don't Be Afraid To Start A Relationship

Many people have experienced terrible relationships in the past. Either these relationships never gained footing, failed shortly after starting, or ended in a threatening storm. The heartbreak and disappointment instilled in us after these difficult experiences makes us feel like failures, but use these failed relationships as guidelines for what you're looking for in a future partner.

Argie Spuck aptly explains, "If somebody is aware of their relationship style, they're aware of what their reactions are when they're upset or they're frustrated. They have healthy boundaries on-board — and healthy internal boundaries — so they will not take a reaction from their husband or partner so personally, [which] makes a profound difference."

The only way to figure all of this out is by being IN a relationship and learning from that experience.

2. Learn To Love Yourself Within A Relationship 

It's impossible to know the best way to take care of and love yourself until you compare it to the way someone else loves and cares for you.

Dr. Stan Tatkin makes the sensible point that "developmentally, it is impossible to love yourself before you love another person. We don't do anything by ourselves without the help of another person — at least in the beginning we don't."

All the heartbreak that you've faced in past relationships is beneficial because it trains you to recognize the BEST way to love yourself and realize HOW you want to be treated by someone else. In exchange, you'll devote the time to learn how to love someone else because you know, from experience, that's what it takes.

Still trying to find out what's so important about consciously preparing to commit to a serious relationship? Scroll up to the video above to hear some more expert advice that can lead you on the path to a loving, strong relationship that's built to last.



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