You Can Instantly Sense When Someone's Fake If You Notice These 7 Behaviors
HI_Pictures | Shutterstock Spotting someone who is fake has gotten a lot harder thanks to social media. From filters to fake private jet photos, you can't trust much.
In real life, it's a little easier if you know what to look for. You just have to listen to that gut instinct giving you the sense that something isn't quite right and start matching that feeling to specific behaviors that can instantly tell you the person you are questioning isn't being real.
Behaviors that immediately give you the sense someone's being fake:
1. They act differently depending on who’s in the room
Andrey Arkusha | Shutterstock
One of the easiest ways to spot whether someone’s fake or not is by seeing how they interact when more people are added to the equation.
Fake people tend to take on different personalities depending on who’s in the room. And no, I’m not talking about putting on your friendly extrovert face when going out. That’s different. I’m talking about people who completely change who they are in front of others. Let’s say someone they like is there or someone they want to be friends with. They may completely flip and turn into someone you don’t know. They might even start insulting you or embarrassing you to impress these new, shiny people.
2. They give compliments that feel more like insults
Speaking of insults, fake people are professional backhanded compliment givers. And they’re never going to be straightforward either, so think less “That dress makes you look fat” and more “You’re smarter than I thought you were.”
These aren’t real compliments, especially if they make you feel worse afterward. And they're often given in a way that makes you feel as if you can’t say anything back. The fake ones will always give themselves just enough room to escape any accusation.
3. They talk behind people's backs
KaterynaUKR | Shutterstock
Talking behind people's backs is a more obvious trait of someone who’s fake. If you have a friend who is constantly talking badly about others to you, then nine times out of ten, they're doing the same thing to you.
When you surround yourself with people who are consistently negative and complain about everything all the time, you will start to feel drained. Even if at first you feel this sense of mutual dislike for something or someone, fake people have a tendency to take that too far and go a little overboard.
4. They care most about what others think of them
Fake people are fake most of the time because they're concerned with their own self-image and want to be liked by everyone they meet.
They are desperately concerned about themselves and less concerned about the friends they make along the way. They would rather tell people what they want to hear than risk being disliked for speaking their minds. But you can only keep up an act for so long before the cracks start to show. Eventually, their actions don't match their words, and people start to notice.
5. They can’t admit when they’re wrong
Fake people also struggle to apologize and admit when they've made a mistake. Most of the time, they can’t even do it. And when they do make a mistake, they have a hard time taking responsibility for it.
Instead of admitting they were wrong, they always have some excuse to give, constantly shifting the blame onto someone else or acting as if the situation wasn't that big of a deal. For them, protecting their image matters more than acknowledging how their actions made someone feel.
6. They are flaky
Fake people are simply unreliable. You don’t know whether or not they'll show up to the get-together you're hosting. Even when you make plans, you can’t really count on them to follow through on anything.
They rarely seem willing to go out of their way for their friends, and you usually don’t get the same energy back from them that you give out. Of course, being flaky doesn't automatically make someone fake. But when a person constantly acts like they care about your friendship and then never follows through, it's a good sign. They seem to want the benefits of having you in their life without putting in the effort to maintain the relationship.
7. They make every conversation about them
Jacek Chabraszewski | Shutterstock
Last but certainly not least, fake people almost always make every conversation about them. Let’s say, on the off chance that they don’t cancel on you at the last minute, and they actually show up and aren't gossiping about others. You finally get to talk about something that's going on in your own life.
Maybe you want to brag a bit, or maybe you are just looking for some advice. Unfortunately, the first chance that fake friend gets, they're going to turn the conversation back to themselves. No matter how serious a problem you may be having, in some way or another, it always goes back to them.
Julia McNulty is a writer with a Master’s degree in Literary & Cultural Studies who specializes in lifestyle, relationship, culture, and human interest topics.
