Woman Invoices Her Brother For Half The Cost Of Her Baby Shower After He Hijacks It To Propose To His Girlfriend
She told him not to do it, and he tried to do it anyway.
zulufoto | Shutterstock A woman turned to Reddit, questioning how she handled her brother's attempt to hijack her baby shower with his own engagement. She explained that after refusing his request to use her shower as the venue for his proposal, he tried to do it anyway.
Instead of simply stewing in silence, this mom-to-be took matters into her own hands and literally stopped her brother mid-proposal. She then sent him an invoice for half the cost of the event because he tried to steal the show. Now, her mom and her brother are both annoyed with her, and she's worried that it wasn't the best decision.
The woman invoiced her brother for half the cost of her baby shower after he hijacked it to propose to his girlfriend.
"I’m due in November with our first baby. We planned a small mixed baby shower at a local village hall: some nibbles, silly games, a couple of speeches," she began in her Reddit post. "Me and my husband paid for most of it, my [mother-in-law] chipped in for desserts. It wasn't anything mad, but it was our little celebration."
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She explained that a week before her shower, her brother asked if he'd be able to propose to his girlfriend during the party since their entire family would already be there. She immediately told him no, but that she'd be more than willing to help him plan something on any other day. It's her special day to celebrate her baby, and it's understandable that she would want to keep the focus on that and not be diverted by her brother's proposal.
On the day of the shower, however, he tried to propose anyway. Her mom actually called him to the mic for a speech. At first, he talked about love and family, but when his sister saw him patting his pocket, as if looking for something, she jumped into action. As he went down on one knee, she grabbed the microphone from him and put him in his place.
She immediately snatched the microphone from her brother before he could continue with his proposal.
After taking the microphone, she announced to her guests and her brother, "Hey, we love you guys, but we’re not doing this today. Let’s please keep today focused on the baby. We’ll help you celebrate properly soon, I promise." The room quickly went quiet, and her brother's girlfriend looked completely mortified before running to the bathroom.
"My brother got angry, said I’d embarrassed him, and left. The rest of the shower was… awkward. Afterwards, a few family members said I did the right thing and that proposals at other people's dos are tacky. Others said I should’ve just let it happen and not caused a scene," she continued.
This issue, more often than not, comes up as it relates to other people's weddings rather than a baby shower, but the sentiment and etiquette are the same. Longtime etiquette expert Jacqueline Whitmore told People, “It’s in poor taste to announce your big news at someone else’s wedding or special event.” She added, "You are essentially taking the spotlight off the bride and groom and directing it on yourself. This can be perceived as rude, self-centered, and narcissistic. It screams, ‘Look at me. I’m important!’”
What made this brother's behavior even worse was the simple fact that he knew his sister didn't want him to do it, and he did it anyway. That's disrespectful to both the mother-to-be and the bride-to-be. A marriage proposal should be its own celebration in the same way that a baby shower is.
"The next morning I sent my brother an itemized request to cover half of the hall hire and the extra drinks package since he tried to, in his words, 'make it our day too.' I said if he wanted to use the party as his proposal venue, he could help pay for it," she recalled. She didn't really expect him to pay and only did it out of spite, but she was entitled to in this instance.
What's truly heartwrenching is that she deserves an apology from both her brother and mother, and the only person she got one from is the girlfriend, who was equally embarrassed that her boyfriend couldn't be bothered to plan a special proposal just for her.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
