If A Guy Can't Be Trusted, You'll Know It When You Hear Him Say These 4 Things On Repeat
cacito | Pexels He seems practically perfect when you start dating and falling in love. But not long after you decide to commit, he becomes needy, clingy, overbearing, and, sometimes, borderline controlling. Perhaps he even becomes distant and uncaring. He had potential, but instead of fulfilling that potential, he left a trail of drama in your life. Worse still, this keeps happening to you.
Many women are attracted to and fall in love with the image of what a guy can become, not who he is at the moment. Many women confess to having fallen head-over-heels in love with a guy despite an abundance of warnings. Then, they gave the guy a second or third chance, only to be let down again.
You can familiarize yourself with the warning signs, so the next time a guy who says one of these things crosses your path, you'll be able to hear them from a distance.
If a guy can't be trusted, you'll know it when you hear him say these 4 things on repeat:
1. 'I love you' — but inappropriately soon
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He has very shallow emotions and connections with other people. One of the things that will probably attract you to him is how quickly he says he loves you and wants to commit to you.
Within a few weeks of dating, you will be the love of his life, and he will want to be with you forever. He will give you gifts and many promises and shower you with attention. You will be overwhelmed at how quickly things are progressing, but you will also be flattered.
A well-balanced guy will wait to know a lot of information about you before offering a commitment. This type of person lives in a fantasy world where nothing is real. He has superficial emotions and falls in and out of love on a whim. Indeed, he will detach from you as quickly as he committed.
2. 'Nobody cares about you like I do'
When you first start dating, you normally won't see any indication of the depth of his jealousy. He may or may not say 'nobody cares about you like I do' outright, but once you've committed, some version of the phrase will start to come up.
With time, he will become possessive, overprotective, overcontrolling, and even overbearing. Your man will do everything in his power to cut off your support system, to control you.
He will start by showing you how your friends treat you ‘badly,’ and your family takes advantage of you. He wants you to withdraw from them so he can increase his control. This is all about his insecurity. He will also check on you constantly and keep track of where you are and who you are with.
3. 'Can you spot me until payday?'
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When you first begin dating, your guy will insist on paying for everything. This is to give you a false sense of financial security because of all their generosity up until now? It's on a timer. Slowly, he will start to milk you. Small ‘cash flow’ problems will set in, and it won't be long until you turn into his personal ATM.
More often than not, he lives on credit, and this is complemented by a massive sense of entitlement since he spends way beyond his means.
Don’t be fooled by someone who showers you with lavish gifts at the beginning of the relationship. Eventually, you end up paying for all of them and then some. The most unfortunate thing is that this type of guy will leave you with heartbreak and severe financial hardship.
4. 'What about me?'
These types of guys are incredibly selfish egomaniacs. He is completely obsessed with himself and his image, and it's always about him — never you.
He will talk about himself all the time and give you little time to speak. Your role is to make him feel good about himself and not bore him with all the minute details of your life. He also lacks empathy and will not stop for a moment to ask himself how his actions are affecting you. Worse still, he will criticize you and embarrass you in public.
You will witness this egocentrism everywhere. He will be rude to the waiters or run other drivers off the road because he thinks he is the best thing that has ever happened to the universe.
If you keep dating selfish, immature, and emotionally unavailable men like this over and over again, things need to change. You've likely become so familiar with the pattern of frustration and heartbreak that you are almost becoming cynical about love. Before you give up on love completely, you need to learn to guard your heart against getting involved with poor-quality men who repeatedly spit these 'red flag' phrases out of their mouths.
Randy Skilton is a relationship coach with an Advanced Diploma in Social Science. His work has appeared on Psych Central and Lifehack, where he educates others on enhancing the quality of their relationships.
