‘Tell Me Lies’ Means A Lot More To Millennials For These 5 Deep Reasons, Says A Licensed Therapist
lev radin | Shutterstock While Hulu's hit TV show "Tell Me Lies" is popular across demographics, it seems to resonate a lot more deeply with millennials.
According to a licensed therapist named Danielle Smith, this obsession that millennials have with the show doesn't just have to do with the drama that's packed into every single episode or wondering what bad decision the main character, Lucy Albright, played by Grace Van Patten, will make when it comes to her toxic boyfriend, Stephen DeMarco, played by Jackson White.
In actuality, the reason millennials are so hooked runs a bit deeper than that. Smith pointed out that the show seemingly does a great job of tapping into a specific time period that millennials remember all too well, and they can't help but relive it while watching.
'Tell Me Lies' means a lot more to millennials for these 5 deep reasons:
1. The nostalgia
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The show is split into two different time periods. The bulk of the show focuses on the characters while they're in college during the late 2000s (around 2007-2008), while other parts of the show focus on the characters when they're well into their adulthood post-college, set during 2015. For the part of the show that focuses on the characters in college during the late 2000s, millennials can't help but reminisce.
From the characters using Blackberries, AIM, flip phones, and the classic college party settings pre-social media, it's a breeding ground for nostalgia. Even the wardrobe of the characters screams late 2000s.
Now more than ever, millennials are being labeled as "the most nostalgic generation" compared to everyone else. While many people assume nostalgia is a bad thing, recent research has shown that nostalgia may be predominantly positive when nostalgic memories are generated on request. And watching "Tell Me Lies" allows millennials to remember a much simpler time.
2. The dating culture
"It captures millennial dating culture before we had a name for it," Smith pointed out. "The situationship. The emotional whiplash. The 'this feels wrong, but I can't walk away.'"
So many millennials lived this dating culture during their late teens and early 20s. It might not have been as dramatic as how the show depicts the relationships between its characters, but it was still messy and felt like the end of the world at the time when things didn't work out.
Before we had words like "gaslighting" or "emotional unavailability" to describe how people acted in relationships, it might've been hard for millennials to put a definition on the toxicity they were experiencing. Watching the show gives many millennials clarity and closure. Almost adding to the nostalgic feeling, they get to look back at this moment in their lives and make sense of the relationships they once found themselves in.
3. The characters make familiar mistakes
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One of the most prominent aspects of "Tell Me Lies" is the fact that every single character makes terrible decisions. Lucy, our main girl, isn't likable for the majority of the time she's on-screen. Stephen might seem charming at first, but he's unsettling in a way that reminds people of someone they once knew.
Millennials aren't just watching these characters because they're entertaining. They connect deeply with them because they remember being them. Millennials remember making bad decisions in college. They remember dating the person who wasn't good for them at all, but they just kept going back. They also remember watching a close friend probably make those bad decisions and go back to the bad person time and time again. It's relatable in the fact that they can put themselves in these characters' shoes.
4. It reflects how trauma and attachment play out in relationships
"Tell Me Lies" is known for depicting different kinds of relationships and their dynamics. The show doesn't frame unhealthy dynamics as obvious villains. Instead, it shows how unresolved grief, insecurity, and the need to feel chosen can pull people into cycles that they don't realize aren't good for them at all.
That complexity seems to resonate with millennials, especially given how much work that generation has done in therapy and reflection. In fact, research has shown that millennials are focusing a lot more on their mental health these days, and more than half have gone or currently go to therapy.
5. It validates the 'why was that so hard?' question
"Watching the show as an adult, many millennials finally understand why certain relationships felt so consuming and destabilizing," Smith explained. "It wasn't immaturity or weakness. It was a lack of support, insight, and emotional safety."
Psychologist Helene Brenner and couples therapist Larry Letich defined emotional safety as being the most important thing for a relationship to work. They explained that it's "the visceral feeling — that is, a feeling that you feel physically, in your body — that with this person or these people or in this place, you don’t have to feel scared to be really you." That is an underlying point of "Tell Me Lies," especially as we see these characters engage in unsafe relationships with each other.
At its core, the show does such a good job of showing just how confusing love can sometimes be, especially when you don't yet know yourself. And a lot of those experiences can truly echo way into adulthood. It's not a show that sanitizes youth or tries to glamorize bad relationships. It shows the consequences and fallout from choosing the wrong person.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
