9 Things I Wish I Had Learned In Sex Ed

By

sex ed
What might a sexologist wish she learned about sex and sexuality growing up?

Growing up in a relatively typical Chinese family in Singapore, I received very little sexuality education. Let me give you the context: I did not know that what I had "down there" was called the vulva even though I had the "bits." I did not attempt to pronounce the word penis until I was 26, and as if that by itself was not awkward enough, I was then told that I said it wrong!

Here are nine things that I wish I had learned in sex-ed as a teenager:

1. The correct anatomical names for the genitals. Without knowing what is 'down there' and resorting to using pet names or blushing every time we refer to our private parts, just how comfortable can one be with one's sexuality, much less sexual expression? Being able to give the correct anatomical names to your genitals is part of healthy sexuality.

2. Adults do not talk to you about sex because they are afraid of being responsible for telling you the wrong things about sex. But mostly, it is because they are not uncomfortable talking about sex themselves. Forgive them for never being able to give you a straight answer or dismissing you because they still see you as a child. Let that go.

3. Do not believe everything you hear from your friends, family, or anybody else for that matter about sex. Most of the time, they are just passing on what they heard from somebody, who heard it from somebody else. Sex Ed for Kids

4. It is ok to seek out information about sex and sexuality. It does not make you any less of a person, but instead better prepared to make the right sexual decisions for you. The more you actually do know about sex and sexuality, the more comfortable you will be in owning and expressing your sexuality. Sex is not dirty, but rather completely natural and normal.

5. Sexuality education does not encourage the early start of sexual intercourse, the frequency of intercourse, or even an increase in the number of sexual partners among the young. Instead, understanding sexuality can actually delay the onset of intercourse, reduce the frequency of intercourse, reduce the number of sexual partners, and increase condom or contraceptive use. Teaching Our Kids About Sex

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Martha Tara Lee

Sex Coach

Check out her first book Love, Sex and Everything In-Between! Join the Eros Coaching Facebook fan page for daily updates on the most happening news on sex and sexuality around the world, and more here!

Location: Singapore, Singapore, Singapore
Credentials: MA, Other
Specialties: Empowering Women, Sexuality
Other Articles/News by Dr. Martha Tara Lee:

Rediscover Your Love of the Rain

By

You’ve heard these expressions: “When life gives you lemons make lemonade.” “Make hay while the sun shines.” So what do you do when it rains? I am on a personal retreat (Sept 24 – Oct 1) in Kuala Lumpur. Read my previous posts about why I am on one, why I cried coming up from Singapore, and what’s in my ... Read more

What's in the Groceries Bag of An Eco-Sexual?

By

At the start of 2014, I set the intention to take a week-long personal retreat every three months amongst other ones made. I am on my fourth of four week-long retreats for 2014 in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia this week (Sept 24 – Oct 1, 2014). Read about how I cried on my way up in the bus here. This week, I am in Bangsar, Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia. I am ... Read more

Progressive Steps to Overcoming Your Fear of Cats

By

This week (Sept 24 to Oct 1), I am on my fourth of four personal retreat in Bangsar, Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia. Read my previous posts about why I am on a personal retreat, why I cried coming up from Singapore, what’s in my grocery bag and my rain dance! I am fortunate in being able to retreat in a beautiful space in exchange for cat-sitting service. I ... Read more

See More

PARTNER POSTS
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Most Popular