Man Asks If He Was Wrong For Insisting Girlfriend Change Out Of White Dress She Was Wearing To Friend’s Wedding
Everyone knows you don't wear white to a wedding.
Gordana Sermek / Shutterstock.com Every wedding has unspoken laws of wedding etiquette — the most important one being that you can’t wear the same color dress as the bride because it would be rude.
A man in his early thirties argued with his girlfriend in her late twenties about this exact tradition after he tried to get her to change out of her off-white dress before going to a colleague’s wedding.
Now, he’s wondering if he’s wrong for telling his girlfriend to change out of her dress and making it a big deal.
Whenever you get into a spat with your loved one, your relative, or even your inner demons, you should go to the subreddit “r/AmItheA--hole” (AITA) to get some advice on who was in the right.
The (most likely unqualified) internet therapists will help you out by giving you a rating catered to your situation — “You’re the A--hole” (YTA) or “Not the A--hole” (NTA) — along with some advice or kind words to help you or the person you hurt feel better.
However, it seems like the man who posted this was pretty confident about his decision because, at the end of it all, he ended things with his girlfriend whom he had been dating for a year.
“As she got in I told her that she looked stunning, but I asked if she could change to a different colored dress for the ceremony,” he explained. “I'm not one for etiquette by far, but one of the few things I have heard everywhere is that you should not wear a white dress to a wedding unless you're the bride.”
He heard the right thing. Sometimes, people will tell you the dress code — what to wear and what not to wear, but if there is not specified dress code, it’s best to assume that you should not wear white.
“She rolled her eyes and said that it was an outdated tradition about women and virginity and that when her friends got married everyone wore white and that it's not a big thing anymore,” he continued.
While she might be right in some cases, it’s still very much a tradition for a lot of people and even if it’s not the color white, you still shouldn’t wear the same color as the bride out of respect.
“My gf became really upset and told me that I was trying to control what she was wearing and that it was abusive, which honestly made me really upset and hurt,” he wrote.
“I said something along the lines of ‘F--k, well you shouldn't go to a wedding with an abuser then’ and then I told her to f--k off out of my car.”
After this point, he seems pretty adamant in his decision because he ended up being right about the bride wearing white, and a lot of his friends stood by him as well despite her friends and a minority of his friends disagreeing.
Not only that, but the quick jump from her to say that he was being “abusive” crossed the line for him, and as many other people stated, said a lot about the type of person she is.
“Calling someone an abuser is a massive allegation,” said a reply to the top comment, “and making such unfounded allegations is a form of abuse in and of itself. It shouldn't be taken lightly.”
Throughout the thread, you can see him working through the comments and the thoughts people have on the girlfriend and their relationship — bringing up the fact that he had abusive family members.
Fortunately, he seemed to have solved the problem in an update and thanked everyone for their wisdom after breaking it off with her.
Isaac Serna-Diez is a writer who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics. Follow him on Twitter here.