Low Libido? Boost It With This Fun Trick

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What Women Want: Better Libido With This Trick
If you're feeling lackluster about sex, you're not alone. Rev your engine with this advice.

Do you struggle with low sexual desire? If so, you're not alone. While trying to figure out what women really want, research found that about one-third of the women in the United States have low sexual desire. There's a surefire way to increase your libido, though, and it's easier than you may think: have more sex!

As you try to understand your own sexual desire, there are a handful of things to consider. The first is that there are very real biological components affecting a women's sexual desire. For example, women have 20-40 percent less testosterone than men. Testosterone is the hormone that gives men that compelling sex drive, and because women have so much less than men, it's easy to see why our sex drive is less enthusiastic compared to that of a normal guy's. 

But it's not just the hormones themselves that work against our sex drive; it's also the frequency of their distribution in our blood that has an effect. For most men, these distributions are consistently frequent, like the sun's rising and setting. The testosterone in their bloodstream spikes about every 15 minutes, supporting an ever-ready libido. It's a completely different scenario for women. A woman's libido is more like the moon in its cyclical nature. Like the moon, our hormone pattern spans a 28 day cycle, in which the hormones and our sex drive differ throughout the month. 

Depending on our hormones on any given day, a woman's libido may be optimal, like a full moon. Some days it may be only operating at half-speed. There are also days when it's like a new moon and reduced down to nothing. This is why our moods and sex drive are inconsistent and often frustrating for both ourselves and our partners. The bottom line is that the very fact that you are a woman gives you a sexual drive disadvantage as compared to men — right from the starting gate. For many women there are also a myriads of other biological, psychological and relationship factors that contribute to inhibiting a healthy sexual desire.

But all is not lost! While it feels unfair, as a sex therapist and a woman who once had low sexual desire herself, I'm here to tell you I have figured out the secrets on how to increase it. In fact, the truth is that once a woman figures out how to access her own sex drive, she will discover that many women actually have a stronger, more limitless sexual capacity than men! We just have to know how to tap into our sexual potential.

To ignite your own sexual desire, you have to begin by having more sex. And yes, for many I know this seems counterintuitive, but the truth is, to kickstart your own desire you need to start having sex. From this place, it becomes easier to engage your libido... and a healthier dose of desire comes from there. 

Feeling skeptical? Here are a few reasons why having more sex will increase your sexual desire:

Sex is like exercise. If you haven't exercised for a long time and you're out of shape, your first day back at the gym may be hell. It won't feel good and it will be hard. But if you ignore your resistance and keep working out, your body will kick back into gear. After a while, you'll start to feel really good. Sex operates the same way. If you haven't been sexual for a while, it will be hard to get going again. But once you get those feel-good endorphins kicked back in, you'll be glad you stayed with it. Keep reading...  

For More YourTango Advice on What Women Want:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Therapist Colette Malan

Marriage/Couples Counselor

Author of upcoming book & program "I'm Not Turned On- Secrets for Increasing Sexual Desire in Women"

AASECT Certified Sex Therapist

Treatment of Sexual Dysfunction

Low Sexual Desire

Tantra Instructor

Couple Communication Instructor

Couple Retreat Facilitator

Location: Ogden, UT
Credentials: CST, LCSW
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues, Sexuality
Other Articles/News by Therapist Colette Malan:

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