When it comes to pleasing men in the bedroom with smokin' hot sex moves, women often mistakenly feel they have to bend themselves into some sort of exotic new position. And while variety definitely adds spice to your sex life, a contortionist isn't always what he wants and in the extreme, can make for some awkward trips to the emergency room!
(P.S. If you want to learn my best dirty talking tips & techniques for building sexual tension & turning him on, you’ll find them in this powerful video)
1. The move that only needs your mouth. Ask any guy and he will tell you this: getting a bj is one of the sexiest things he can receive from his girl. To get you started, here are three things to remember when going down on him.
- Too wet is better than too dry. All guys prefer it to feel wet and luscious as opposed to dry like sandpaper (yikes). Don't worry if you find that you're producing a ton of saliva — this is a great thing. Alternatively, if you're having trouble producing saliva, simply use an edible, water-based lube to moisten your mouth.
- There's more than just the tip. Don't neglect the other parts of his groin area when giving your man oral sex.
- Pleasure, not pain! If you're serious about his pleasure, then you need to make sure not to accidentally graze or even bite by mistake. If he is a bit too big for your mouth and you find it difficult to keep your teeth from accidentally grazing it, try wrapping your lips over your teeth.
- Learn some awesome techniques. If you are interested in learning some pretty wild and very fun oral sex techniques, then you may be interested in watching this video. where I'll teach you exactly how to give your man incredible pleasure using only your mouth.
2. Move on from missionary. The easiest hot moves that you can learn are new sexual positions. While most people stick to the tried and true positions like missionary, cowgirl or doggie style, there are hundreds more lovemaking positions that you can learn.
Some of these require extreme amounts of flexibility and don't actually make for great sex ... so just make sure that you can physically perform them!
3. Talking dirty. A lack of communication during sex is going to kill your sex life. Thankfully, dirty talking is a turn-on to men and doesn't kill the mood. If you've never tried it before or you're a little bit nervous at the thought of trying it, remember that you don't need to sound like a porn star to sound sexy to your man. Groaning and moaning is the easiest way to let your man know how he's doing. Even whispering in a husky voice, "A little deeper", will let him know what you want while still keeping him totally turned on. You'll find a detailed video on how to talk dirty on this page.
4. Turn him on ... by being turned on. By far the easiest and most powerful hot sex move that you can use on your man is showing your enthusiasm. You don't actually need to talk dirty, know a ton of sex positions or even know how to give a good blow job if you're just enthusiastic. It lets your man know that he's doing a good job, because no man ever wants to feel like a failure in the bedroom. Arch your back, gently grab his hair or whisper naughty things in his ear —these are steamy, yet subtle ways to show him that he's turning you on.
If you want to learn more advanced sex techniques, like how to give great oral sex, then you may be interested in a very helpful (& powerful) instructional video I created. You can watch it at this link.
"A little bonding tape goes a long way in stimulating sexual creativity and inspiring couples to enjoy some playful submission and domination."
—Ian Kerner, Ph.D, sex and relationship counselor, and author of books including: She Comes First; Passionista; Be Honest, You're Not That Into Him Either and D.S.I. Date Scene Investigation.
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More sex tips on YourTango:
- Spiritual Sex: 10 Erotic Commandments
- Sex Positions Men Love
- Sex Stories #119: 'The Night I Roofied Myself'