She's Doing Threesomes & He's Doing Lonesome

By

She's Doing Threesomes & He's Doing Lonesome
Learn why you must date only those who share your values and sexual boundares!

"Adam" recently wrote me with this question: "Should I be tolerant when it comes to a girlfriend hanging out with ex-lovers? They are not people she dated, but people she has slept with. Recently, she blew me off for a “friend” coming into town and I found out the “friend” was someone she had a threesome with. The "friend" was also spending the night at her apartment. She was not upfront or honest about it. She had other recent ex-lovers she wanted to hang out with, too. I broke it off because I’m not cool with it. I said she should give these people up if she wants to be with me or at least make the effort to explain why I should be comfortable with it. Did I do the right thing?" He Wants To Have A Threesome & That's Just Not Happening

My answer is for Adam, and for anyone else going through a similar scenario. There are major red flags all over this “relationship.” No, it’s not okay to have threesomes, and it’s not okay to have someone you once had a threesome with spend the night with you while you blow off your boyfriend. It’s not okay, that is, if you want a committed relationship that is built around love and fidelity. Post Valentine's Day—How to Be Happily In Love Next Year

What are your values? What is okay and not okay with you? If you don’t have any sexual boundaries yourself, you can’t expect your partner to have them. But if you do have moral and emotional boundaries about sex, then date someone who shares your values. You are fooling yourself if you think the other person will change. If you are not clear about your own values with regard to sexuality, that's a great reason to get counseling or coaching. Are You Running Away From Love?

Article contributed by

Nina Atwood

Author

Nina Atwood, M.Ed., LPC
The Singlescoach®
Visit my website for FREE resources!
Visit my author page on amazon.com
Love Strategies Internet Radio
 

Location: Dallas, TX
Credentials: LPC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues, Dating/Being Single Support
Other Articles/News by Nina Atwood:

4 Types Of Men You Are NEVER Going To Change (So Stop Trying)

By

Before you dedicate yourself to changing a man, take a look at these four types of unchangeable men. Chances are, the tiger you want to run through your "love of a good woman" rehab has no chance of ever changing his stripes. There are four general categories of dating pain that you may encounter from different types of men. One is a potential ... Read more

4 Hot Tips for Bringing Love Into Your Life This Year

By

It’s almost January, that time of year when we set new intentions and goals, but are you setting the kind of goals that will bring love into your life this year? It turns out there are some “do’s” and “don’ts” that can make a huge positive difference as you set your goals for 2015, especially if you’re ready to ... Read more

Single For The Holidays? How To Be Happy And Make The Most Of It

By

It is that time of year again—holiday music playing, parties and merry-making, couples strolling along laughing, family, and all the trimmings. If you are not in a relationship, all the holiday trappings in the world may not stave off your feelings of loneliness. Being the only single at parties, you may be the odd man out (or odd woman out). What can you ... Read more

See More

 
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular