Be A Safe Slut

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Be A Safe Slut
A Plea For Mutual Masturbation

Sluts get a bad rap, and masturbation often does to, but if you are like me, you know that both exist as a functioning part of human sexuality.
I heard this line in a movie recently, that “sex is neither as good or as evil as you make it out to be,” which means that if we were to get over all the taboo around sex, we’d accept it, and all it’s facets, for what it is, a natural part of human nature.

I don’t think we should blindly follow typical monogamy rules, does that make me a slut? If so, be it. But, is it really so uncommon to want sex without strings attached? In a word, No. I’ve also heard that most people in a relationship fantasize about breaking up every day. But, let’s be honest, in a world where monogamy is king and marriage and couple hood reign queen we are to hard-pressed to really embrace sexual freedom with several partners. It’s just not a viable option for many.

There are problems associated with sleeping around, that self proclaimed sluts, and all others who dream of sleeping around and/or those who even entertain the idea, must first acknowledge. First things first, Sexually Transmitted Infections, STD’s and STI’s, are a very real thing. Sure, condom usage is a given but not always a guarantee, and let’s face it, let’s be real here, putting on a condom, or using a dental dam can be downright awkward or at the worst it can kill the mood. Not to mention they distract from the beauty of our human bodies, stripping away from the raw, salacious nature of the act. I am one for embracing sexual gratitude, with that said, I am still a fan of safe sex, and creative use of prophylactics, but recently discovered a better way to be slutty with several partners that doesn’t involve felatio, cunnilingus or coitus.

We don’t have to put our mouths on each other’s genitals, we don’t have to spread our legs, or even penetrate the skin to get each other off. It’s true, we don’t even have to have bodily contact to get each other off. It’s sometimes hot enough, taking our clothes off in front of someone else, letting them know how aroused we are by them, and agreeing to engage in mutual masturbation without actually touching one another. I think the acknowledgment is key here. The other person becomes aware of how turned on you are, and by masturbating in their presence each gets a key into the others sexuality, like a birds eye view, lets us each be a participant in something that doesn’t feel too much like pressure, like you have to take the next step further, and isn’t too forced. In my opinion, mutual masturbation also opens up our playing field even wider. We can express our sexuality, show someone how hot they make us, be sexual in each other’s presence, yet, not engage in something that might make us feel pushed into a corner, or which might bring up awkward feelings later on. Mutual masturbation is the easiest and safest way to have a no strings attached interlude.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Moushumi Ghose

Sex Therapist

Moushumi Ghose, MFT specializes in sex and relationships and is based in New York City and Los Angeles.

She is the host of The Sex Talk, a web-series dedicated to raising awarenes about sex, and sexuality, and has made several TV and media appearances including Hollywood Today The Girl Spot, Durex Condoms and Investigation Discoveries as a sex expert. 

Visit her website at www.LASexTherapist.com

Subscribe to The Sex Talk Series at www.TheSexTalkSeries.com

Listen to podcasts at Sex, Love and Rock 'N' Roll Radio.

Mou is the author of Marriage, Money and Porn, available on Amazon, and is currently writing her second book, about non-monogamous sex. 

Follow Moushumi on Twitter @MoushumiAmour and Facebook

Location: New York, NY
Credentials: LMFT, MA, MFT
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