Social anxiety happens to everyone.
There’s seems to be this idea that if you’re an extrovert or someone who loves to socialize, you don’t have any kind of social anxiety. But that’s not true — we all have social anxiety at some point in our lives.
Extroverts tend to draw their energy from being around other people, but that doesn’t mean they don’t experience emotional distress, uneasiness, or feeling uncomfortable. It may be easier to understand how an introvert or someone who focuses their energy internally may have social anxiety, but extroverts have it as well.
While an extrovert has a part of themselves that constantly wants to meet people, they may have another part which overthinks the social situation to such extreme that they may avoid it all together.
I have a very extroverted friend who loves going out, meeting people and socializing, and she is constantly doing those things. But even she has times where she doesn’t feel as if she has the energy to go out and worries that something will go wrong if she pushes those feelings away and heads out to the party anyway.
When you’re an extrovert and have social anxiety it’s as if what your mind wants and what your body wants are not only two different things, but those things are at battle. You try to psyche yourself up to go to an event but your body is feeling flushed, your heart feels as if it’s pumping too hard, and you’ve started to sweat.
Most of the time you can calm yourself down and have a good time, but there may be certain triggers that you just can’t fight, and leaving the event or avoiding it are the best options.
No matter how you deal with your social anxiety, it’s a good idea to remember that everybody has it at one time or another and that your feelings are valid. Here's how you show your social anxiety, based on your zodiac sign.
While you have a lot of confidence and can be very dynamic, you still experience social anxiety from time to time. You express it by taking a long time to reply (if ever) to texts, messages, emails, calls and especially group messages; you can get nervous about misspelling something, saying something that is incorrect or too blunt. You also worry that you'll lose your temper at a real-time event.
You're not always gifted when it comes to communication so you'll practice what you're going to say on the phone, at a meeting, or any kind of social event. The more you practice, the more anxious you become which makes the cycle continue on.
If you're in a social situation and you get nervous, you tend to shut down completely while people mistakenly assume that you think you're too good for them.
It's difficult to believe that you'd have any kind of social anxiety but you do experience it. When you're feeling anxious you tend to talk fast, be too jokey, or just ramble on and on. This is your go-to behavior when you've zoned out and you're not really present. Since you like to joke around and talk a lot anyway, most people can't tell when you're having an anxiety episode.
As someone who likes to hole up at home and tends to wear their emotions where everyone can see, it's understandable you might get very socially anxious. Before you go to the party or event, you tend to get easily agitated.
Your aggravation increases the closer you get to leaving until you wonder if it's a good idea to cancel. If you can get out the door, you can distract yourself away from the anxiety by concentrating on getting to the event.
Underneath all your bravado and confidence is someone who needs constant reassurances to ward off feelings of insecurity and uncertainty. When you dealing with some social anxiety, you don't retreat, you advance and you get loud. You laugh and engage with everyone around — anything that will convince people that you aren't extremely agitated and struggling.
You like to be by yourself but you also like people. However, you definitely have your moments of social anxiety and when you're feeling those anxious feelings you tend to come across as cold, blunt, uptight, and awkward. The ironic thing is that you may come across as a tight-assed but you're actually trying to engage with that other person.
One moment you're the life of the party and the next, you'd do anything to not be there. When you can't stand the anxiety a moment longer, you'll just leave. Sometimes you'll say your goodbyes but other times you get out quickly as if you just committed a crime. If you're the host of the party, you'll start cleaning up or putting out more food.
Since you tend to feel things 10 times as intensely as anybody else, it's not surprising that when you're socially anxious your feelings are magnified. Your body will react by raising its temperature so that you'll start to sweat everywhere including the palms of your hands.
You try to calm down and not show any emotion, but your unease is clear from your body language and facial expressions. You then will focus on your hair, your purse, or the paper napkin in your hand.
You love meeting new people and you love laughing, but you still have the occasional episode of social anxiety. You usually force yourself to go to the social occasion and will smile and basically try not to get into anyone's way. You want to leave but you're sure that once the episode passes you'll be able to connect and make new friends.
You pride yourself on being dependable and if you say you're going to go to a party or event, you go, even if you're having social anxiety about it. With the event and your anxiety, you have to make a plan.
You decide what you're going to wear, how you'll do your hair, how you'll get to the event, and make sure that you have the perfect gift or food item if required. You start mentally preparing days ahead, so spontaneous invitations aren't your favorite.
You like people and humanitarian causes but there are times when you can get socially awkward. You cover your awkwardness and anxiety by talking a lot and telling rambling stories. In your head, you're telling yourself to be quiet and that everyone is judging you, but you can't stop chatting. After a big event, you must take a day or two to regroup and decompress.
You can be social but you much prefer being by yourself, dreaming and creating. When you're at a social event and it gets overwhelming, you tend to zone out and go somewhere else in your head. You're usually awakened from your daydream by someone asking why you're staring at your empty class or the garbage can.