Fried Eggs, Norks, and 98 Other RIDICULOUS Names Men Call Your Boobs

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funny names for boobs
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Buzz, Sex

Our history books are full of them.

Why do we call breasts “boobs”?

It’s a silly word — boobs — but somehow, over the ages, it’s become one of the most common, recognizable ways to refer to a woman’s breasts. But that doesn’t mean it’s the only one.

“Boobs” are just one of hundreds, possibly thousands, of slang terms that men and women have used to describe a woman’s breasts. (Or to use a gross modern term — her “chesticles.”)

According to The Dictionary of Contemporary Slang, the term “boobs” probably showed up around the late 1600s. Renowned slang lexicographer Jonathon Green believes that "boobs" derives from the word “bubbies,” which has its root in the Latin phrase bibere, which means “to drink.” Over time, bubbies became boobies, which eventually ended up as boobs.

Which, as we mentioned is a little childish, but it’s considerably better than a LOT of other terms that men, in particular, have used when speaking about breasts. (Boobs sounds much gentler than something like “sweater meat.”)

But language experts can trace nicknames for breasts all the way back to the early 1500s. One of the earliest recorded slang terms for breasts were “paps.” So that means we have over 500 years of boob nicknames in recorded history. That’s just insane. (It also reminds us that we need way more nicknames for man boobs.)

To honor that fine tradition, we decided to go back and collect a list of some of the more memorable (or downright strange) historical nicknames for breasts. These come from various sources — mostly notably, Green’s Encyclopedia of Slang, The Dictionary of Contemporary Slang, and the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue.

(You can find a cool interactive timeline of many of these terms here.)

While lexicographers like Green admit that not all of these terms were commonly used, they all appeared in print, in scripts, in newspapers, online — somewhere in the public record.

Here are 100 actual nicknames that (primarily) men have given boobs over the past half millennium, starting from the 1500s all the way to the modern era.

(We’ve bolded some particular favorites along the way.)

Paps
Ivory balls
Apples
Globes
Heavers
The Dairy
Dumplings
Udders
Plumpers
Cupid's kettledrums
Bushel bubbies
Titties
Cat-heads
The Milk Shop
Poonts
The Upper Works
Nature's founts
Baby's public house
Knockers
Berkeleys

Bustle

Dibs
Bag of snakes
Tooraloorals
Coconuts
Prams
Milkshakes
Honeydews
Cabman's rests
Dairy arrangements
Briskets
Bazooms
Field artillery
Fried eggs
Pippins
Big brown eyes
Avocados
Jersey cities
Milkers
Cats and kitties
Equipment

Giphy

Gay deceivers
Bordens
Maracas
Lumps of temptations
Bonbons
Doodads
Melons
Lewis and Whitties
Lung-warts
The Upper Deck
Nice ones
Cheaters
Shock absorbers
Hooters
Thingies
Dinner buckets
Lamps
Nubbies
Jugs
Top 'uns

Giphy

Jabongoes
Top bollocks
Chabobs
Groodies
Cans
Norks
Funbags
Bazookas
Ninny jugs
Lunch pails
Chi-chis
Nay-nays
Bee-stings
Chubbies
Watermelons
Hangers
Baby bumpers
Doorknobs
Threepenny bits
Irish draperies



Buzzies
Glands
Wallopies
Yabbos
East and West
Gazongas
Bombers
Num-nums
Bodacious tatas
Walter Mittys
Bazoombas
Jigglers
Mods and rockers
Mary Ellens
Two puppies fighting in a bag
Moonlight flits
Airbags
Shirt potatoes
Flithy pillows
Honkers

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