WTF: New Sexual Fetish Involves Pushing Alien Eggs Into Your Vagina

Photo: WeHeartIt
alien
Sex

We can't make this stuff up, people.

I like to think that I'm not easily shocked. I've been in spoken word shows with titles like Taboo Tales, Bawdy Storytelling, and Tasty Words: Sexy Beast.

I've heard stories about many, many different kinds of fetishes and I've learned about sexual acts and preferences that I never dreamed existed. As someone without a fetish for golden showers, BDSM, and scat play, I know a lot about them. 

So, if I say that reading Toby McCaskers' article in Vice about a new fetish that involves laying alien eggs inside yourself made my jaw nearly hit the floor — you know that's an unusual (to say the least) fetish.

Full disclosure, while I have total respect for whatever turns you on, I don't like eggs — not alien, not chicken. This makes breakfast a challenge for me. I find them disgusting, so the act of making and then putting alien eggs up your vagina or backside would never be something I'd partake in.

I may not be as open-minded to the alien-egg-insertion fetish as I am to some of the other more unique fetishes that people have. 

I've heard about people having or fantasizing about having sex with aliens, but never implantation with alien eggs. Apparently there's also just a basic Oviposition fetish of being implanted with non-alien eggs, and some anime has alien-egged stories. Is it really so different than ben wa balls?

First of all, you'll need an ovipositor:


Photo: Primal Hardwere

Let's say you think you might have an alien egg insertion c. Where would you get the equipment you might need? The go-to place for alien-insertion devices called Ovipositors is Primal Hardwere

Primal Hardwere is run by a very nice man that goes by the name of Lonewolf. He was looking for some kind of business and came up with Primal Hardware.

As he said to Vice, "Let's face it, there are three things that always sell: Food, death, and sex. I tried food service and decided after managing three restaurant and owning one that it was the same thing, day in and day out, and it didn't look like that was going to change much. Death didn't interest me I wanted something more fun. Something that breaks the monotony."

He traded in eggs sunny side up to alien eggs up your orifice. 

NSFW. What do you get when you put a dildo together with one of those grip/claw things?


Photo: Primal Hardwere

When you purchase an Ovipositor, alien eggs aren't included. However, you do get a free mold with which you can make your own gelatin eggs with.

Here's a video that shows you how to make gelatin eggs:


YouTube

Primal Hardwere isn't responsible if anything should happen with the gelatin eggs. As Lonewolf said when asked if there was any danger in putting gelatin eggs up in your butt or vagina, "Everything in moderation. We are not doctors, and we're not about to comment on what is safe or unsafe to do to one's body as it varies from person to person.

I can say that I have used them many times without hurting myself, but frankly it's up to the person to know their own limits. For instance, if you are allergic to gelatin. If made properly, the eggs are firm, but rubbery, similar to the consistency of gummy bears. They dissolve with body heat rather quickly."


Photo: Primal Hardwere

Luckily, gelatin allergies are relatively rare, because gelatin is in all kinds of unexpected places such as some medicines, instant pudding, and even marshmallows. Lonewolf doesn't mention what you could use instead of eggs.

You can use an Ovipositor by yourself, a partner, or a group of like-minded adults for a new kind of egg-hunt. 

Primal Hardwere offers two different kinds of Ovipositors: the Splorch and the Krubera. They are very easy to load as this video shows:


YouTube

If you grow bored with Ovipositors and gelatin alien eggs, Primal Hardwere also has some other fun products including tentacles, harnesses, and various wearables that you can place over your penis so it resembles a cat penis, a werewolf penis and a horse penis, just to name a few.