He's going to THANK you for this!
By Nick Hardwick — Written on Feb 03, 2016
You might have the best blowjob technique in the world, but if he doesn’t believe that you love going down on him, it’ll never be all it can be.
Men associate their penis to their masculinity. If you’re disgusted by it or treat it with anything but love, his ego will take a massive hit. On the other hand, when he knows that you really do love giving him head, you can use a basic technique and still be the best sex he’s ever had.
Just imagine a guy who goes down on you, has a great technique and really knows what he’s doing, yet it’s obvious that he’s not enjoying himself. Now picture a different guy who’s technique is ok, yet it’s obvious that he absolutely loves going down on you. He can’t get enough and acts as if you’re the most delicious thing he’s ever encountered.
Not the same experience at all is it?
So how can you truly love oral sex if you have guilt, shame, or aren’t getting the reactions and feedback that make you feel confident and sexy? Here are 6 ways to start loving blowjobs, even if you hate doing it now:
1. Focus on your sensations.
Rather than putting all of your attention on the technique you’re using or the man you’re with, put your attention on the physical sensations you feel. Feel your lips making contact with him and gliding up and down.
Notice the taste and texture when you massage your tongue against his shaft and head. When you’re focused on your sensations, you’re not focused on his lack of enthusiasm, and negative thoughts don’t consume your mind.
2. Get personal with his penis.
How would you let someone know you love them? You hug them, kiss them and spend time with them. How many of these things are you doing with his “manhood?”
If you want to feel true, unconditional love with a man, you must allow yourself to be vulnerable with him. The same is true for his penis.
Many women are afraid to completely enjoy their man's penis, to express themselves in its presence, to let themselves cry while devouring him even if it means having makeup running down your face. The most powerful way to love his manhood and make him feel it, is to let go of how you think you should be during a bj and fully embrace whatever emotions, desires and feelings come up for you. Allow yourself be consumed by your sensuality and let him see it.
3. Be mindful of the words you use.
Language is incredibly powerful. More powerful than the words we use, are the meanings we give to them. The meaning we give to a particular word plays a huge role in how we feel about it.
If you refer to your man’s penis as “his junk” or “privates,” what kind feelings do those words bring up in you? Do they inspire arousal? Do they make you feel empowered? Sexy? Confident?
How do you think they make him feel?
One of the first things I have women do in the blow his mind program is to choose powerful words to describe your mans penis. Think of all the masculine, powerful, erotic energy contained inside his organ and chose a word that implies all these sexy traits.
4. Convince yourself.
While we don’t fully understand them yet, beliefs seem to be an idea we have repeated to ourselves enough times that our brain has created a hardwired layer of myelin in the brain.
In other words, repeat something to yourself enough times and you’ll begin to believe it.
By giving your man’s penis compliments, you can create any belief you want about it, and drive him totally wild by boosting his erotic ego. The trick is to use compliments that are believable.
If he’s averaged size, don’t say “you’re c*ck is so huge!” Instead, tell him it’s delicious. Tell him you love it and that you love sucking on it. These are compliments that he can easily believe (as long as you say them with conviction) and therefore, let his ego get boosted — and so does your sex life.
Your brain will also begin the myelination process that will eventually convince you of all the compliments you’ve given him.
5. Use conditioning to associate your pleasure to blowing him.
If you’ve studied any psychology, you know about classic Pavlovian conditioning.
Ivan Pavlov (a researcher) was studying the process of salivation in dogs. Initially, he thought the dogs would salivate when they saw food, but he quickly realized the process started the moment they saw him — whether or not he had any food.
This led to the famous bell experiment where he rang a bell at every feeding time. Eventually, he would ring the bell without any food in sight and the salivating would begin. The dogs started to associate the sound of the bell to the pleasure of eating food.
You can use this same principal to make yourself feel sexy and orgasmic every time you go down on your man. All you have to do is hold a vibrator between your legs when you go down on him.
To see results faster, take just the tip of him in your mouth and don’t focus on giving a blowjob. Instead, give yourself an orgasm.
Your brain will associate your pleasure and orgasms to having him in your mouth.
6. Become great at giving blowjobs.
It can be hard to enjoy something we, err, suck at. So learn to love going down on your man by becoming great at it.
There are plenty of articles with great tips on this site and countless books on the topic, but if you really want to give the best blowjobs ever, you must learn from someone who knows what it’s like to give and receive them.
Nick Hardwick is the sex expert behind blowhismind.com and can teach you how to give any man the best head of his entire life with a simple 3 step formula.
