We like to think of female sexuality as romantic and mysterious. Little did you know: it’s neither.
Welcome to Female Sexuality 101!
Here is a quick lesson on some big pointers that might just change everything you think you know. These are the 10 myths about female sexuality that you need to stop believing.
Hold on to your knickers.
Even if some women need the romance to lose their pants, it certainly is not a given. Rumpy-pumpy with a stranger or friends with benefits is, in fact, something a lot of women enjoy.
Women, just like men (or people of other gender identities), also get off on things that are dirty, taboo, and sometimes down-right-wrong-rom-coms be damned.
2. The clitoris is just a tiny button.
When talking about your clitoris (as you do), you’re usually referring to the small, pea-shaped head.
And even though that head has a whopping 8,000 nerve endings, the clitoris is actually less of a small knob and more of a complex system. It includes only two legs but also two vestibular bulbs, making the whole shebang an impressive 3-4 inches long!
3. She's naturally more monogamous.
f this were true, women would never have a bit of ‘how’s your father’ on the side, nor would they get divorced, separated or have one-night-stands.
Female sexuality, like male sexuality, also craves variety and a bit of adventure. In fact, some people even argue that women are less suited than men to have monogamous relationships.
4. Orgasms are elusive, mysterious, and take hours.
No, they’re not and they definitely don’t. The reason it seems this way is because our culture is obsessed with heterosexual vaginal intercourse, often mistaking it as a synonym for sex.
If oral sex was the grand finale, the pièce de résistance, the only people we’d refer to as coming "too fast" would be women.
5. Orgasms appear within 2 ½ minutes of vaginal penetration.
Because of our love of all things penetration, women are also paradoxically expected to come just by being filled by a penis.
And even if some women can reach the big 'O' penetration alone, most women usually need direct clitoral stimulation, hence oral sex being more of a realistic finale.
6. Women don’t like anal sex.
Actually, a bit of anal buggering is a fantasy shared by all genders. According to Pornhub’s annual review of how porn was viewed on their website in 2016, 'Anal' was one of women’s favorite categories.
This indicates that penetration of the patootie, whether fantasy or reality, is something women do indeed enjoy.
7. Women aren’t visual creatures like men.
Assuming this was right, women wouldn’t care what they looked like, let alone give a flying fancy about men’s appearance (if that’s the way they’re sexually inclined).
We’ve already established that women, like men, also watch porn. And assuming their viewing isn’t only for the aid of learning love-making — it speaks to women being visual. This is much similar to women’s interest in clothes, shoes, interior design, makeup, and… yeah, you get the point.
8. The female sex drive is weak — especially compared to that of the male’s.
The notion that women’s libido is lower than men’s is actually quite new. During ancient times, the sexes were seen as equally passionate, immoral and obscene. In fact, it wasn’t until the 1700s that a shift was brought about, from female sexual pleasure being viewed as natural to their desire being seen as sick.
Women were considered morally superior, passive and fragile, a view one might argue still exists today. But in case history doesn’t convince you that the discourse on women’s libido might just be a thing of the times, try reading Daniel Bergner's book, where he describes female libido is found to be equally as strong as men’s.
9. Hymens pop when she loses her virgnity.
No, there will be no popping. The first time "Penetrator Penis" is in town the hymen doesn’t actually rupture, as it doesn’t cover the vaginal opening at all.
The hymen, or the ‘vaginal corona’, as it is also called, consists of mucous tissue held together in thin folds. It’s located 1-2 cm inside the fabulous vagina and surrounds it, as opposed to covering it up. This explains why most vagina-owners don’t bleed when debuting sexually.
10. Female sexuality is pure and sweet.
Nope. Women get turned on by it all.
A quick read in Nancy Friday's book on women’s sexual fantasies reveals everything from incestuous relationships with siblings to detailed descriptions of gorilla-sex, proving that female sexuality is varied, adventurous and everything but sweet and pure.
So, there you have it! The quick lesson on 10 things about female sexuality that you’d gotten completely wrong. Well done for getting through it, and congratulations on your new-found knowledge. Now, for your homework: spread the gospel!