It's not the truth that hurts. It's not knowing the truth.
It can be devastating when a guy leaves you and you don't know why. You can spend months sometimes even years trying to figure it out. This can be even worse than the guy leaving you because it can keep you bonded to him and keep you from meeting someone else. Here are 3 secrets to consider.
You ask for more, better or different. This is a tough one because you may feel your only taking care of yourself and your needs which is great. The challenge is when you consistently asking a guy for more, better and different you are signaling a guy that he can't please you and what he does isn't enough. When a guy says to you I can't please you I'm letting you go to find someone who can you have touched this wound which right or wrong is often the number one reason why guys leave you. You still get to ask for what you want and say no to what you don't want the remedy is in your communication with him... read A Life Of Love.
You become his mother. Once you get on the road of telling him what to do you are on the way toward being his mother. If you been taught that love means taking care of other people and their needs you may find yourself picking up after him fixing his problems and in extreme cases paying his bills. The other danger is he may like it and let you do everything for him like his mother did. You may end up with a sexless relationship he finally leaves because men are not turned on by their mothers.
He's still a boy. Sometimes with no effort on your part you just inherit a guy whose still a boy. This is a guy who hasn't gone through his Fisher King Wound... Read A Life Of Love. He hasn't learned hopefully from his mother that women, children, animals and the planet are not here for his gratification. He hasn't learned to give, protect and cherish women, children animals and the planet which is often why guys leave you when the going gets rough. They are only interested in what feels good in the moment and instant gratification. In a nutshell you have a Peter Pan dare I say it yes I will please read A Life Of Love.
I can't tell you every reason why guys leave you. I can tell you this. We're always attracted to the right wrong person until we get the lesson. He who leaves first without learning the lesson repeats the lesson and you know you've learned the lesson when you no longer want to repeat the lesson. For your part watch out for asking for more better or different and see what he willingly gives. Men fall in love when they give. If he doesn't care about your feelings and leaves you with no explanation. He's not your man he's someone else's boy.
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This article was originally published at http://www.jamesallenhanrahan.com/. Reprinted with permission from the author.