Connecting via Facebook, emails, texting, tweets and instant messages can be convenient. Technology can offer fast ways to ask your husband to pick up lettuce at the grocery store on the way home or to let your wife know that you'll be home later than usual. But according to new findings, this convenience may come at the cost of closeness in your relationship.
That's because reserchers from Oxford University have found couples who keep in touch too much via technology tend to have less satisfying marriages. The study surveyed social media used by 3,500 couples, including Facebook, emails, texts, tweets and instant messages. Couples who used five or more electronic channels of communication reported an average of 14 percent less relationship satisfaction than couples who were less electronically connected.
How could this be? Doesn't connecting more (in any capacity) foster closeness?
Well, the answer is yes and no. Any connection a with loved one beats no connection at all, provided that the connection is neutral or positive. Sending a text that reads, "See you after work" is neutral information-sharing. On the other hand, sending a text that says, "I love you!" conveys a much more positive message and fosters loving feelings ... at least a bit. And swapping naughty texts back and forth over the course of the day gets you hot for each other when you climb in to bed together at night. However, virtual connecting is never a substitute for physical togetherness and it tends to make matters worse in your relationship. Here are four reasons why:
1. Technology makes it easier to fight dirty. Anger can be too easily impulsively shot out in an email or text. Too many folks dash off a quick nasty comment in response to something that annoyed them. If they click and send before they've had time to calm down and think through a more tactful response, there's likely to be trouble ahead. Keep reading ...
More relationship advice from YourTango: