Are you stuck in a sex rut?
By Megan Fleming — Written on Jul 17, 2017
Isn't it time you stopped making your partner or your current circumstances responsible for your happiness and sexual pleasure? The truth is, most of us unwittingly sabotage our pleasure by focusing on what we don't have or want more of.
When you are single, you crave a relationship, and when you've been in a relationship for a while, you often end up wishing you were alone or partnered with someone else.
Related: How To Get It On Like A Total Pro (According To Total Pros)
That's human nature. Unfortunately, we are biologically wired to notice the negative even while good things are happening. How often do you automatically and unconsciously turn yourself off by noticing what could be better instead of the beauty and opportunity of what is?
Complete this sentence: "I turn myself off sexually when I think about ______."
There's no better time than now to take control of your sex and your life, and here are 4 steps to show you how:
1. Dream your dream.
Imagine your best life. What is your own unique and personal vision of the sex and the life you want? Envision yourself inviting, stretching, growing, becoming and having the sex and the life you desire.
2. Be aware.
Pay attention. Any time you notice a negative thought or feeling, acknowledge it and let it be. Then redirect your attention to several things that are positive as well as true in this moment.
As the expression goes, whether you think the glass is half empty or half full, you're right. Bringing your attention to the positive shifts your energy and makes it more expansive; it is part of the process of inviting more of the experiences you want.
3. Complete this sentence: "I turn myself on when ______."
Do you even think about that? Your role in your experience is vital because you choose what you make room for and notice. We often think it's our partner's job to turn us on, but there are things we can do to put us in control of sex.
The liberating truth is that there is so much you can do to open yourself and turn yourself on to the experiences you really want in sex and in life.
Related: How To Have GREAT (Not Good) Sex: 7 Tips To Make It Hot Every Time
4. Take action.
When you're ready to drop the bad habit of turning yourself off by thinking about everything your partner does or doesn't do for you in the bedroom, you can take charge of turning yourself on!
I believe we all have a personal responsibility to keep the flame of our own desire burning. The brain is the biggest sex organ; use it well, and it'll give you the sex of your dreams!
