'Talk Dirty To Me': The Dangers Of Playing With Mr. Erotic Texts


Why You Should Beware Dirty Text Messages
Those naughty texts might seem like harmless fun, but there's a sinister side you need to beware of.

It's going to happen. You're going to meet a man online, and you're going to give him your phone number. You'll start texting him, and you might even talk on the phone a few times. Even after you've spoken on the phone, he'll start texting you again. Things are going well, but then then slowly but surely, he'll start talking a little naughty to you. He's going to see if you'll go there with him.

How you react depends where you are in life. If you haven't had sex in a while, you might love the male attention. It's been a while since you've felt these erotic feelings, and it makes you feel good. There's nothing wrong with it. You're only human, so you can't resist it. He's turning you on, getting you excited and maybe he's even getting you a little wet.

You crave the attention, and you can feel him sweeping you up in it all. Let's face it, it's natural to want attention, and it's natural to want sex. This man is giving you what you need. But here's the thing: He's opened a door you need to close as quickly as possible!

I love naughty texts. I love having erotic talks with a woman by text. It turns me on as much as the next man. There's not a man I know who doesn't enjoy hearing how great he was in bed the night before, or a breakdown of what she wants to do to him when he gets home. But there's a time and place for everything, and that time isn't when you first meet a guy. If you open that door with him too quickly, you won't be able to control yourselves, and you'll end up having sex faster than you planned. 

Now the guy gets exactly what he was looking for: sex. And you end up getting exactly what you weren't looking for. You'll have sex with him, develop feelings for him, and after a month or so of sleeping with Mr. Erotic Texts, he'll start texting you less and less. He'll start losing interest, and now you're left nursing a bruised heart.

It might be fun, but it doesn't work. You know what else is likely to happen? This guy will suddenly reappear after a while. He'll want to see you again. He'll make excuses why he hasn't been in contact, and he'll promise to make it worth your while. The real reason he's back in contact is he hasn't found another women willing to play dirty text with him. 

You get together with him one more time hoping things have changed. Maybe he wants to take you seriously this time. You have sex again, and soon you realize it's happening all over again. When you open the door to Mr. Erotic Texts from the get-go you're going to end up confused, alone, and this guy won't leave you alone.

The rush of oxytocin has hit, and you've had the orgasm you craved for so long. The problem is this guy isn't your emotional equal. He doesn't want anything more than sex. Don't waste your time trying to figure this guy out, or worrying about what you're doing wrong because you're not doing anything wrong.

You just gave into Mr. Erotic Texts a little too fast. Slow down, and let him get to know you a bit. If he's turned on by you now, imagine how much he'll want to ravish you once you've been together a while.

More advice on dirty text messages on YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

David Wygant

Dating Coach

Are you ready to finally find love?



Location: Marina Del Rey, CA
Credentials: Other
Other Articles/News by David Wygant:

Why You Can't Let One Heartbreak Destroy You


Life is a series of events. I want you to look at that statement, and then I want you to read it again. Life is a series of events. In fact, I want you to read it one more time. Life is a series of events. Read it, and say it aloud to yourself six times. Now that that's lodged firmly in your head, I want to ask you a question. Why does one event traumatize ... Read more

The 5 REAL Reasons Men Are Scared Of Marriage


I've been around the dating industry for 20-odd years now, and I've heard every reason under the sun for why men are scared of marriage. You've probably heard most of them yourself. "Men don’t want to commit because they're not built to stay with one woman. Men won't marry because they would rather spend their lives running round ... Read more

The Deadly Dangers Of Infatuation


I had a strange dream this morning. You know when you start having a dream, but you're half-awake. Every time you go back to the sleep, the same dream comes up like some weird series on television. That's what was happening to me this morning. I dreamt I was at my ex's house. I was chasing her all around the living room. I was infatuated and ... Read more

See More


Sign up for our daily email and get the stories everyone is talking about.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.