It's time to lose the group and head out on your own.
Let me ask you a question: Do you want to go out on weekends to meet someone, but you don't want to do it alone so badly that you're willing to gather a group of your friends together whose personalities don't even mesh to do it? Doesn't it seem, though, like when you go out with all of your friends that you don’t ever seem to meet anybody? There’s a few reasons why.
If you’re a woman and you’re going out with a bunch of friends, there’s always one girl in the group who’s had a bad week, or the cat dumped her, or the guy she likes didn’t call her back, or her boss was nasty to her all week. She’s the “poor me” of the group, and all she wants to do is bitch the night away.
So what all of you do, being good friends, is give her the attention she needs instead of the sedative I’d give her. What happens when a group of guys approach your group, is that someone gets stuck talking to Ms. “Poor Me” as she is in her “I hate men” mode. That’s the end of that group dynamic!
I know all the ladies have experienced something similar with men, because guys can be equally as bad as women. They’ll go out in a pack like a bunch of drunken wolves. There’s always the guy who hasn’t been laid in a while who blames all women for that when in fact he really just has no rap. So then when your group is trying to talk to his, one of you gets stuck talking to Mr. “No Rap” who comes over babbling random things and sending the conversation in sixteen different directions.
This all doesn't sound too fun, does it? It also doesn't seem to be getting the desired result of meeting someone. Let me suggest a better idea – try going out to meet someone on the weekends during the day . . . and by yourself.
I spend my weekend days alone. I may grab lunch with a friend, but in general I’m alone. That puts me in a perfect situation to meet women. When you go to meet men, being alone is so much better because you don’t have to deal with your friends . . . It’s just you and them. They’re not distracted at all.
You can strike up casual conversation everywhere . . . from the dry cleaners, to coffee shops, to department stores, to grocery stores, to video stores. You could spend the whole day by yourself talking to people. Try it one weekend.
Get away from the pack mentality this weekend, and try running alone. Let me know what your results are. I guarantee you’ll meet far more interesting people when you’re out and about doing weekend errands, than the drunks and the annoying people you encounter in bars and clubs.