If you're looking for ways to get him to commit, I believe hearing from a commitment phobic man who has "been there done that"; may open HIS eyes to what life may be like 16 years in the future.
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I never thought that I’d ever admit this but, I’m a life-long commitment phobe. (And for the record: It’s not a great life.)
As I get older and as the invitations to parties, social gatherings and cottage weekends dry up, I see now what I’ve missed out on. Worse than that, the reality is that nobody wants the single 40 year old bachelor hanging around their wives. It’s true.
When you’re a young, brash, strapping and handsome man with bedroom skills, you don’t think about the future, you think about conquest.
If however, you’re fortunate enough to be romantically overwhelmed by a woman and fall in love with her, (even for a short time,) you’ll find a way to fuck it up because that’s what you’ve trained yourself to do. That’s what commitment-phobics excel at. Fucking up.
Today, I’m writing a letter to someone that I probably should have spent my life with but I screwed it up so profoundly that I’ll never be able to forget what a fool I was. So, if you’re a woman and you believe that your man is “phobic” about taking your relationship to the next level, have him read this.
We met on a chat line. I still can’t believe that I could have been as lucky as I was to find such an intelligent, unquestionably, beautiful, spiritual and sensual woman to love me the way you did. Maybe I wasn’t ready or, maybe I couldn’t believe that a woman so perfect could love such an imperfect beast such as myself.
Each day that we spent together was magical. I can’t believe that we never went a single day without saying I love you and I can’t believe that we never went a single day without holding hands or touching one another. It was the best time of my life and sadly, I never ever told you that. Instead, I ran. You would mention marriage and I would panic. I shouldn’t have.
It’s probably too late now, but the reality is: You knew that you wanted to marry me. You knew that we were right for one another. You knew that what we shared was as close to perfect as we could ever come. I didn’t know, and at the time I didn’t want to know. I wasn’t prepared to admit it to you or anyone else and I wasn’t even sure why.
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Today, I can admit it. I was scared that I’d eventually lose you. My fragile male ego couldn’t get past the thought.