10 Guys Share Why They Stopped In The Middle Of Having Sex With A Woman
"She put her finger in my butt."
weheartit Sometimes the best stories about sex have more to do about why you didn’t finish than how good it was when you did. For most of us, once things start getting hot and heavy, it would require a natural disaster or a massive personal injury to warrant hitting the brakes on a solid tryst.
We've seen our fair share of slight inconveniences and powered our way through to the finish line, but what, exactly, would have to happen to make us call the whole thing off?
We asked guys to share their funniest, weirdest, or otherwise most notable reasons why men stop in the middle of sex, pumping the brakes and abandoning ship. Here are ten of our favorites:
1. She vomited on my penis.
"She threw up on me after severely underestimating her deep throating skills. We got back going in the shower. Night was salvaged and we saw the sun come up."
2. We didn't have enough chemistry.
"I have this weird thing where if I'm hot, I can't orgasm. I don't know what the deal is there. It also takes me a while to get there sometimes... there have been a few times where maybe the chemistry with the other person wasn't what it should have been and I just quit because it wasn't going anywhere."
3. We got caught by the cops.
"I have stopped sex mid-session for only one reason and that was because we were doing it in the back of an SUV and the cops pulled up and stopped us."
4. She put her finger in my butt.
"A cute, mousey blond and I hooked up one night and were going at it. You would never know from her wardrobe or the way she carried herself that she was a bit of a freak. She wanted to be choked, spanked so hard I left welts, and bit so hard it drew blood. I was okay with most of it but some of it weirded me out a bit as it was my first time into anything even remotely this rough. However, I was young and sex is sex so I went with it.
About halfway through while she was riding she did this odd move where she slid forward, leaned way back almost lying down, and switched holes. Then just as deftly as she did that, she slipped a finger into my ass. Now, to say I was surprised/turned off would be an understatement. It was literally like turning the fan off of one of those waving arm guys. I sat up, quietly put on my pants, and walked out of her dorm room."
5. Our daughter walked in.
"We were having some early-morning fun, buried under our comforter, and all the sudden our 4-year-old daughter is standing by our bedside asking 'WHY YOU MOVING?!!?' That killed it for a while."
6. She sharted on me.
"In the middle of a 'manual DP' with me in the backside of her, her on my lap managing the dildo ALL while on camera being video, she sharted all over my junk."
7. Her friends purposely interrupted us.
"Well, there’ve been a number of false starts, but the worst time I’ve stopped mid-game is when I was drunk and balls-deep in a girl at a party she was having at her house, and her roommate and ALL their friends decided to barge in and start cheering for us. I think someone even got pictures. I should’ve made a joke of it and dismounted like an Olympic gymnast, but I was so mortified in the moment, I just ran out and never showed my face around there again."
8. She called out the wrong name.
"My ex 100 percent called out the wrong name. Nothing has ever gotten me out of the moment and into my head so fast. I was out of bed and yelling before she could blink."
9. She had a PTSD flashback.
"I wish I could say this only happened once, but I dated a girl who’d just gotten out of a really, really bad situation and she would break down in tears at various times when we were becoming physical. It broke my heart to see and it was like walking through a minefield anytime we got started because we both wanted to be intimate, but she never knew what would trigger her and she had a lot of guilt about it. We worked through it but I had to learn how to temper my libido to help her feel safe again. Even now, I’m super-cautious when getting into something new with someone."
10. We got caught... in the club.
"We got busted and kicked out of the club. In my defense, I don’t know why they put satin daybeds in the VIP section if they didn’t expect drunk people to get weird on them."
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Liz Pardue-Schultz is a writer and activist based in North Carolina, where she overshares her bizarre journey through mental illness, recovery, parenting, and surviving Southern suburbia on her blog or anywhere she can get published. Her words have appeared in Huffington Post, Time.com, XOJane, Ravishly, ThoughtCatalog, and one time in the Letters to the Editor section of Playboy.