5 Things You Should NEVER Do During A Threesome

Photo: WeHeartIt 
how to have a threesome
Sex

And five things you absolutely MUST try...

Having your first threesome is a right of passage on your sexual journey.

You don't have to be into the kinky lifestyle to want to try a threesome.

After all, sex with one person is great, why wouldn't sex with two be even better?

But it's not all fun and orgasms (even though it mostly is all fun and orgasms). 

In fact, most of us don't have a clue how to have a threesome. We're taught how to have sex with one other person, and we see threesomes in movies and porn. But none of those things actually teach you how to have a threesome. Not a mutually-pleasurable, real-life threesome at least.

There are some rules that you need to know before the three of you head for the bedroom. Some things you need to know about how to have a threesome.

And there are also 5 things you should NEVER do during a threesome. 

1. Don't randomly put your finger up a butt

Giphy

Threesomes are an exceptional amount of fun, but you've got to maintain a sense of order and decorum during them or they can just totally fall apart. 

Panicking during a threesome and just randomly shoving your fingers up people's butts is an understandable but problematic choice to make during a threesome.

Think about it, how would you respond if suddenly there is an un-lubed finger being jammed up your ass? 

You would probably punch someone in the face. 

Then the threesome turns into a brawl which can be fun in its own right, but is very, very different than threesome sex.

Read the tone of the threesome and take your cues from the body language (and actual language) of the people you are having sex with. Communicate what you'd like to do, and what you'd like to have done to you. That way you know everyone is on the same page and consenting.

 

2. Don't demand attention 

Giphy

Spoiler alert: triple kisses aren't a real thing. 

They were invited by drunk college co-eds in an attempt to demand attention.

And it's good they aren't a real thing.

Because a kiss can be fun and sexy and erotic, but a triple kiss pretty much just turns into dogs licking each other's face. 

Not hot. 

Taking your turn during a threesome is important. 

If you want to be the one making out, don't whine about it, look for something to do. 

The best part of a threesome is that there's always a body part for you to grope. You'll get your turn to kiss.

 

3. Don't make any assumptions 

Giphy

Do not assume that just because you are a having a threesome, anything goes. 

Like all sex, threesome sex should be consensual. 

Always wanted to try anal sex? Now is not the time to spring it on one of your partners. 

Want to dress like a horse and be whipped by your masters? Yeah, don't just sashay into the room wearing a Seabicuit mask and then get surprised when they are like "...."

Threesomes are kinky, but kink doesn't define them in total. 

Go in with an open and accepting mind and be attentive to your partner.

Like all good sex, it isn't just about you, and that goes double when there's another person in your bed. 

 

4. Don't stay totally silent 

Giphy

You already know how important it is during sex to communicate with your partner.

It doesn't have to be a lecture, but letting them know, yes this turns me on, no that doesn't, yes that feels good, ow, you're pulling my hair is an essential part of sex with anyone, or any number of people.

Communication is essential in threesomes not just so that folks know what works, but for logistical reasons. 

If you're confused or need or want something, ask for it when you are in the moment. 

Words and knowing how to use them during sex are essential for a successful threesome. 

 

5. Don't violate the rules 

Giphy

There is nothing less sexy than rules.

But rules are a MUST for any threesome.

All three of you need to be on the same page about what's going down when you get down.

Maybe someone only wants to receive and not give, maybe the women don't want to interact,  maybe the man just wants to watch.

Whatever YOUR rules are, stick to them.

Like any relationship, trust is essential for good threesome sex. 

 

Explore YourTango