To have good sex, you have to have an equal partner, and he's far from viewing a woman as equal.
A few weeks ago, Kirk Cameron got all uppity about marriage. He claimed that "Wives are to honor and respect and follow their husband's lead, not to tell their husband how he ought to be a better husband. When each person gets their part right, regardless of how their spouse is treating them, there is hope for real change in their marriage."
Leaving aside any claims of domestic violence — of which they are many — Cameron basically tells women they need to submit to their husbands, no matter how horrid. What if he's leading toward executive fraud? Biker gangs? Sexual molestation? No matter. Lead on, husband of mine!
But if the man takes the lead in everything, he's certainly missing out on something: the bedroom. He's calling on all women to be submissive in the bedroom. No cowgirl, no reverse cowgirl, no cunnilingus. He's advocating a wham, bam, thank you ma'am style of sex, which never works out well for the woman. These poor ladies are doomed to bad sex for the rest of their lives.
This especially falls true for evangelical boys. They haven't had any formal sexual education and wouldn't know a clitoris if they found it under their tongue (which they won't). These boys' sole sexual education consists of pornography, probably of varying graphicness, which shows the man on top and the woman a willing submissive partner. She actually likes it when he comes on her face.
Of course, because porn is a sin, sex gets tied up in shame and degradation. And girls get tied up in that same shame and degradation. So porn is sinful, women are sinful, and sex is something you want desperately and should sublimate. Add God in there and this is a seriously messed-up stew, far from healthy sexuality.
So what happens to these boys on their wedding nights? Well, neither they nor their purity ring-wearing bride have had any real sexual education, including possibly how, exactly, to make babies.
They go upstairs and he strips off her white dress. She lays down on the bed. He inserts his penis, thrusts, thrusts, thrusts, and comes. No thought of anything but missionary position. No thought of her pleasure. He's got that virgin/whore dichotomy pretty bad. She belongs either in the kitchen or sucking his dick.
Then there's the type of guy who just genuinely believes women are less than men. He hates Hillary Clinton, probably has flirted with those creepy men's rights groups, and has used the word "feminazi" on a regular basis at some point in his life.
This guy has no idea what to do with a woman in bed. He hates women too much. To have good sex, you have to have an equal partner, and he's far from viewing a woman as one of those.
If he can even find someone willing to go to bed with him, he's hardly likely to know what to do. For one, he's also raised on porn, so he's got a skewed view of female sexuality. He's too stunted to manage a real conversation about sex: what she's into, what he's into, what feels good, what doesn't.
His entire ethos is based on not listening to her. So when he gets her naked (fat chance), there's not much he can do with her, other than learn from porn: thrust, thrust, thrust, come (on her face). Maybe make her suck him off. If she expresses any preference, he'll likely ignore it: women, after all, should keep their mouths shut.
Then there are the men who think women don't know what's best for them. He's never had an authentic sexual encounter in his life, because he's incapable of actually listening to his partner. If women don't know what's best for them in life, how can they know what's best for them in bed? It wouldn't matter if she made suggestions or requests; he's the man and he knows what's best for her.
Like the other men who think women belong in the kitchen, that probably includes a skewed perception of sex based on hardcore pornography. The poor girl's sucking dick and getting a pearl necklace without anyone ever going down on her.
Because real men don't perform cunnilingus. It makes him kneel between her legs or sit under her vagina, both of which are positions of subservience. Going down on a girl is all about her, which no real man would suffer.
Because remember: a real man knows what's best for a woman.
Men who think women are subservient aren't likely to be a good lay. They get their ideas from porn, they won't listen to what a woman wants, and they don't take suggestions or requests. Men who say women belong in the kitchen don't know what to do with them in the bedroom.