Make your partner feel loved, everyday.
By Marcus Kusi
We all have different partners in life. However, there is ONE partner who is foremost in your mind.
The ONE you want to spend the rest of your life, share your dreams with, and care about. The ONE you are proud to talk about with your friends and family. The ONE who compliments, challenges, and sometimes provides you with the constructive feedback you need to hear.
As you know, life can get busy. And like many, we can easily forget to make our partners feel loved every day. But if you are intentional, you can make your partner feel loved every day by doing some simple things.
1. Smile, hug and kiss your partner.
Smiling alone can brighten up not only your partners day, but yours, too. It is proven to help reduce stress and increases productivity. Smiling is contagious, so why not smile with your partner every day? Even babies smile while in the womb.
Also, you can give your partner a passionate hug and kiss every day. Personally, it’s the last thing l do before l leave home and the first thing to do when l get back home.
A one-minute hug, kiss and smile could lead to many things for you partner, yourself, and your relationship.
2. Compliment your partner.
Tell her she is beautiful. Tell him he is handsome. Compliment their character quality or places you can see they are making an effort in.
When I come home from work to my wife and see she is tired from taking care of our two toddlers all day, I say, “Thank you for taking care of the kids all day.” Sometimes the compliment can be in the form of a thank you. “Thank you for remembering what I asked you to do, I really appreciate it. Thank you for trying to change this habit, it means a lot to me. Thank you for working so hard for us.” Or something like, “You are so good at cooking/social situations/ making me feel loved,” etc.
As someone who struggles with giving and receiving compliments, I can definitely say this has been a game changer for our relationship.
My wife loves compliments, so complimenting her on even the littlest of things she does boosts her confidence. It helps her to know l see the little and big things she does. She also feels appreciated and loved. l am sure if you do the same for your partner; your relationship will become better.
3. Say “Thank you for choosing me.”
Thank your partner for choosing to be with you. Being with someone is a choice we make every day. We choose them every day over the temporary pleasures, over our selfishness; and they do the same. Your partner chose YOU out of the billions of people in this world. Be thankful!
4. Listen to your partner.
Listening is a skill that requires intentional effort from you. Listening means you give your full and undivided attention to what your partner says. Never listen and think about your response.
Your partner will be able to communicate better with you if he/she knows you listen to what they say. When you listen to your partner, you will also be able to provide them with constructive feedback on questions, ideas, or discussions they have with you.
5. Spend time together.
It could be cooking, playing a game at home, or going to an event. This is the time you get to connect with each other on a different level. You get to ask your partner about their day and tell them about yours. During this time, you can talk about your goals as individuals as well as a couple. Share what you are learning.
You get to have great conversations, laugh, and be happy in each other’s presence. Do something together every day, even if it is taking a bath together.
When it comes to spending time together, my wife and I spend an hour together every day; after we put our kids to bed. We are very intentional about spending time together every day because it helps us to connect with each other.
We have it set as reminders on our calendars. It used to be 30 minutes, but now we have increased it to one hour. It has made us grow closer together, and we look forward to that time every day.
Choose whatever time that fits your schedule and commit to spending that time together with your partner.
6. Encourage your partner to achieve their goals.
We all have dreams. I have some BIG ones, and l am sure you do, too. Your partner also has some BIG dreams.
Despite how well we plan and act on our dreams, there are days when you feel like giving up. When the hindrances and roadblocks seem unending.
However, a little encouragement from your partner could be all you need to overcome the obstacles and achieve your dreams.
Spend a few minutes every day to encourage your partner to achieve their dreams. If your partner does not have one, help them figure it out. You are in this together.
Say it in person, via text, social media, email, etc. Say it when you wake up first; whisper l love you to their ears.
Pick three of these simple things and start doing them for your partner today.
If your partner works from home, put a note saying “l love you” on their computer, tablet, or phone screen. In my case, it’s usually changing her screen saver or wallpaper to say “l love you.” You could leave it as a voicemail or send it as a video, too.
As you can see, we can all do these simple things for our partners every day. Pick three of these simple things and start doing them for your partner today.
What other simple things can you do for your partner every day?
This article was originally published at The Good Men Project. Reprinted with permission from the author.