The debate continues ...
Is love at first sight really a thing?
In the video above, SVP of YourTango Experts and host Melanie Gorman, relationship and communications expert Fiona Fine, author and dating coach Gregg Michaelsen, matchmaker and dating coach Jasbina Ahluwalia and biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher say that there's still no definitive answer to this romantic mystery.
Because many people haven't experienced it.
Many people fell in love with their partners later on in their relationship — often a year or so after first meeting. They felt a deep connection to and a lust for their partner at first but not full-blown, head-over-heels love.
The Difference Between 'In Love' And 'Loving'
"I believe their's a huge difference between 'in love' and 'loving'," explains Fiona Fine in the video above.
"... I actually was dating a man — I had been dating him for about a year — and all of the sudden, a year later I fell in love with him. And I literally — we both felt it shift, and my chemicals and everything shifted. And he never fell in love with me. He always loved me, but he didn't fall in love with me. So ... I don't think that we fall in love at first sight. I think that ... a lot of other things happen."
Science Says It's Possible
But according to many psychological and anthropological studies, love at first sight might actually be a possibility. According to Dr. Helen Fisher, "From a purely biological thing, this is a brain circuit. This is a brain system. It's like fear system. It's like the anger system. You can get mad instantly, you can get scared instantly, and I think you can fall in love instantly. And in fact, I think that this whole brain system evolved to be almost instant."
It's one of the three brain systems — "sex drive (lust), one is intense feelings of romantic love (obsessive love, being in love, infatuation, whatever you want to call it) and the third being feelings of deep attachment" — that have evolved to give a helping hand to mating and reproduction.
"And so I think the very specific brain system that evolved millions of years ago," Dr. Fisher continues, "to enable you to focus your mating energy on one particular individual and start the mating process, and it can be triggered instantly."
So is it love or lust? There definitely needs to be more research done on this love mystery. But for all of you romantics out there, keep believing!
Want to hear more expert insight on the love at first sight debate? Scroll up to hear what our other YourTango Experts have to say.