When you're first dating, you don't know when or even if you're going to make love. The anticipation is exciting, and you often spend quality time kissing and building up to that moment when you finally "do it."
Once a relationship is established, couples all too often stick to the same old sexual routines, trying to get right to the big O without allowing their passion to build up. Foreplay becomes short and sweet, and sensuality is an afterthought. But these habits tend to make climax … downright anticlimactic.
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The good news is that you don't have to do it in public or buy expensive sex toys to give your sex life a boost. You just need a sensuality injection. To a large degree, sensuality is the art of the tease. It engages your senses and gives you the means to create sexual tension.
With that in mind, the following seven ideas can help you to build desire toward a more exciting finale—with or without the big explosion. In fact, you can try these ideas when you don't have the time or energy for sex, allowing these moments to build over a few days until you can finally get more delicious time together. Stop Settling for So-So Sex!
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1. Tickle and tease. Gather several soft items, such as lambswool, a feather, silk or velvet fabric, and/or a flower like a rose or orchid. Ask your lover to close his or her eyes, and try lightly teasing and stroking your lover's body with these items. Choose sensitive spots like the side of the neck, the nipples, the palms and the genitals. Ask your lover to guess what you're using to tease and tickle.
2. Face to face. You kiss, but how often do you touch your lover's face with your fingertips? Using a scented moisturizer, take turns lightly stroking each other's faces, building to a gentle massage. Do it with your eyes closed, as if you're sculpting a beautiful figure in clay. You'll be amazed how beautiful your partner's bone structure feels without the interference of sight, and you'll discover just how responsive your facial skin is to your lover's touch.