A Guy's Perspective On What Makes Sex Good
Good sex: a man explains his preferences.
I have never met a woman who thought she was bad in bed. I have known plenty of women who can rattle off an impromptu, critical dissertation on the carnal failings of most men. "He didn't get me off." "He treated my nipples like Xbox control sticks." "He came before his pants were off."
No, not all women are great in bed. Is the onus on dudes to break the bedsprings? I say no. It is both of our responsibilities to be the best lay possible. There are women who kick back Cleopatra-style and dare their men to please them. Women who use men like giant, hairy vibrators, and women who are so eager to please, it can be overwhelming.
(Oh, and on a side note: feathers are never sexy. Never. Neither are oils, and I'm emphasizing the plural here. One broad I dated had a shelf of scented oils and my skin crawled when she reached for them. Man was not meant to glisten and smell like lavender.)
Granted, I realize there is a difference in standards. Some men think that "good in bed" means "she has a vagina and is willing to let me put my penis inside of it." Most guys, though, care about getting you off, and also care, deeply, that you care about getting them off.
I'm going to bring up a friend of mine who spoke to me in confidence a few weeks ago. Let's call him… Chet. Anyway, Chet met a chick at a party, got digits, went on a few dates with her, followed the Romantic Nice Guy book, and finally, after a month or so, slept with her. For the next week, they did the deed a couple more times. He was unimpressed and therefore, despondent. She was bad in bed.
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Discussion
I've been with a partner or two that weren't good in the sack. In my younger years I've even faked on orgasm (yes, guys can fake an orgasm to. Just because he unloads doesn't mean that it came with the usual big O). I've even been with some that have had 3 times as many partners as I have and still have nothing to add. Ladies, you are there with us to! If you aren't enjoying it, chances are we aren't either. If you aren't doing anything to change that fact then you have no right to complain.
A girl I knew after college was similar - for the most part she was very still in bed and had almost imperceptable but definite orgasms, so it was less satisfying than more passionate episodes later in life. Not everyone should be expected to act and behave the same , just like not everyone likes red wine or hard booze, so I consider it a matter of preference, which did not turn out to be mine in this case,
Best regards, Cal
