Choosing your life partner is one of the most important decisions you'll ever make. When you find the man who'll be beside you every day, it impacts every aspect of your life. So, when I see women who approach finding their "soulmate" with so little concern about it's true importance, I feel overwhelming frustration.
They meet and date perfectly good men, men who want to be in a committed relationship; but then they treat these men as if they were nothing special, as if there were plenty more where they came from. They make the same mistakes with men over and over again, get the same results, and are in complete denial about their own behavior. This tells me they don't take themselves or dating seriously enough.
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I've also seen women transform into adolescent girls when they date; they have no regard for consequences. When they do this they diminish themselves and of course get less than spectacular results with men. How can you stop sabotaging your dates and give looking for love the importance it needs? 3 Surefire Ways To Know If It's True Love
Here are the three most common mistakes you may be making:
1. You break your own rules. How many times have you changed your mind on a date and let yourself be persuaded to break your own rules? The rule I see women break the most often is about when to have sex. You know what I'm talking about. You've determined that you won't go to bed with a man until you both agree to be monogamous. How To Remove Your Ex From Your Life & Your Closet
You've promised yourself not to sleep with a man who is also sleeping with other women. But, as soon as you begin to date a man you're attracted too, you get caught up in the moment and like an impressionable young girl, you give in. You get intimate too soon with a man you could really care about. It changes everything and you've hardly gotten to know each other. Breaking this rule rarely works out in the long run.
Here are some other rules you might find yourself breaking:
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- You pursue him instead of being patient
- You give more attention to him than he's giving to you
- You lose yourself and make his needs more important than your own
2. You don't fix what's not working. Human beings tend to like the familiar. We have a comfort zone we find hard to leave unless we're really pushed. Life-changing experiences like illness or a car accident will propel you to make new and daring choices. But when life is just going along as usual, you can get lazy and avoid making the changes you need to be more successful with men. 6 Healthy Ways To Re-Activate Your Love Life
One example is the fear of "making waves" in a relationship. Instead of speaking up for yourself, which can be a real challenge, you'll go with the flow to keep the peace. Or if you're used to having your guard up around men, you don't risk being hurt by allowing yourself to be vulnerable. You just stick to being the way you've always been because it's easier than facing the fear of the change you need to make.