Think you can't climax during intercourse? Think again!
Have you heard the myth that says some people can orgasm through intercourse while others can't? Well, don't believe it. Everyone can learn how to climax during lovemaking; it just takes a little practice and a lot of patience.
If you use the following four techniques correctly, you are going to be able to have an orgasm every time you get intimate!
1. Learn to relax your mind and body.
You need to understand that there is a vicious cycle that people often fall into when trying to reach orgasm during sex. They get uptight because they are not getting closer to orgasm, and this in turn makes it more difficult to actually orgasm. In fact, they are further away from having an orgasm because this causes extra tension and stress, which only makes it less likely for them to orgasm.
Learning to relax and not caring about having an orgasm may sound counter-intuitive, but it's actually vital if you do want to climax. So in order to proactively relax and let go, have sex in a place that makes you feel safe and relaxed — for example, your own bedroom.
Pamper yourself before you have sex. Take a nice, long bath or shower. Then, afterward, slip into something really comfortable. A surprisingly powerful way to relax is for your partner to say, "You are not allowed to orgasm tonight" or "I don't want you to orgasm." It works a little like reverse psychology and many people find that this takes the pressure off of them to climax.
2. Make foreplay last a long time.
Both men and women enjoy foreplay, and it ultimately leads to stronger and more powerful orgasms for both sexes. Make sure your partner knows this. So, how long should foreplay last? Ideally, it should last for at least 20 minutes, but it can last for much longer.
By spending up to two hours caressing, kissing, massaging and rubbing your body, you will both be more relaxed and aroused than if foreplay only lasted for three minutes. And being more relaxed and aroused means that reaching orgasm will be far easier.
3. Turn off the lights, and turn up the music.
Turning the lights off when you have sex has a powerful effect. If you are self-conscious about your body, you'll find that having sex in the dark takes away a lot of the pressure. In the dark, your partner can't see your body, he can't make eye contact with you, and he can't see what you are doing. This takes a lot of the anxiety out of sex for many people.
Listening to music is great for filling the room with sound that drowns out the sounds you and your partner are making. It can also turn you on and add extra eroticism to your sex session if it's an artist that puts you in the mood.
4. Explore what turns you on.
Relaxing and turning the lights off is all very good when it comes to learning how to have an orgasm, but it's a little passive. In order to be more active, find things that turn you on and bring you closer to orgasm. If you want to know how to orgasm every time you sex, you need to get to know your body intimately.
Think of it as fun homework. Spend a few nights alone in bed learning about what you enjoy, what turns you on and what brings you closer to orgasm. It could be direct clitoral stimulation, penetration with a dildo or vibrator, or even simple nipple stimulation.
No matter what it is that arouses you, it's important to find out. When you discover what enables you to orgasm easily, relay the information to your partner so he can apply what you learned when you're together.
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