Here are some of the pros and cons you should be aware of before ever considering this relationship scenario, in honor of the upcoming film Friends With Benefits. In addition to our advice, you'll find the opinions of real men and women, who were kind enough to share how this situation has played out in their lives. Read on for the inside scoop on this tricky situation.
Pro: It's Easy
You already know him, the two of you hang out regularly, your hormones are raging, you're not seeing anyone special at the moment… and we all have needs. "When I was in university, a friend and I ended up being very compatible in the bedroom, which we discussed as being a natural extension of our friendship," says Bobby, 38. "At no point was there any pretense of love, relationships or even 'real' intimacy. It was quite simply friends who occasionally took their clothes off and did naughty things to each other."
Con: It's Too Easy
Whether you're too lazy to date or are afraid of being hurt, the scenario can easily become a crutch. "For me, 'friends with benefits' works only if you don't really care about [the guy]," says Aoi, 30. "Good relationships come from giving, but this type of relationship is more about taking." Plus, when you have all the sex you need at your beck and call, there's no incentive to get out there and meet potential suitors.
Pro: End A Stereotype
No commitment, no emotional baggage—a straightforward friends-with-benefits arrangement means casual sex without the responsibilities of a romantic relationship. With your independence intact, your life doesn't have to change all that much. Plus, since common belief holds that a woman can't have emotion-free sex, you'll feel like a renegade for breaking the stereotype.
Con: End A Friendship
On the flipside, acting totally comfortable with casual sex may lead your bed buddy to see you only as a means for sexual pleasure. "One of my longtime best friends and I decided to try this out once. And things got so awkward, we barely spoke for four months," says Natalie, 23. In this situation, sex oftentimes replaces other aspects of the relationship that you once enjoyed, like long weekend brunches or regular movie nights, not to mention the friendship itself.
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