As anyone in a committed relationship knows, the inner dialogue of passion changes once you've been together for a while. Your partner is no longer "new," and touch may now feel more comfortable than thrilling—but that doesn't mean that your sex life can't still inhabit that exciting, novel space of a new relationship. Keeping your erotic imagination active is they key to great sex within a long-term relationship. While your partner doesn't change, your approach, attitude and desires around what you want in bed can and certainly will.
I can't stress enough how important it is to share and explore your fantasies with your partner. It's a guaranteed way to keep the voice of your erotic imagination loud and clear in your relationship, especially when so many routines and responsibilities threaten to drown it out. Here are three simple steps to identifying, sharing and exploring your fantasies together:
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1. Figure out what turns you on.
Where to begin? Start by turning yourself on, noticing what thoughts, images and fantasies speak to you. Do you think of your partner, previous partners, the stranger you passed on the street, a celebrity?
I also recommend movies and erotic reading. When it comes to fantasy, one size doesn't fit all. Watching movies with erotic scenes and reading fantasies is a great way to notice which themes, sex roles and practices speak to you. You might even find yourself shocked to notice what turns you on! Not to worry, enjoying the freedom and exploration of putting yourself into fantasies of places you would not want to go in real life is common and often part of the excitement. Have fun with it. Keep reading ...
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