ProConnect

How To Save Your Marriage: 7 Tips To Succeed At Counseling

By

How To Save Your Marriage: Tips To Succeed At Couples Counseling
Don't wait til it's too late! Most couples wait six years before getting outside help.
Ask yourself: What are you willing to do to salvage your relationship?

Another relationship bites the dust. It's an occupational hazard for a couples counselor, but still, it's always sad. Despite my best efforts to help people negotiate the choppy waters of relationship distress, many of them simply don't make it.

It goes something like this: A distressed husband or wife pleads on the phone, "I am calling for couples counseling. We have a problem with communication." So, we set an appointment and begin the process. The specific problems are wide-ranging and many of them have gone unresolved for months, even years. So why can't they make it work? Therapy can save your marriage, but you have to be prepared. Here are my tips for couples to come out of counseling sessions successfully.

More from YourTango: My Holiday Gift To Men Everywhere

1. Do some indepth soul-searching before you begin. Do you want to fight for this relationship even when it is painful, challenges you and is profoundly uncomfortable? Know that it will be difficult.

2. Don't wait too long. Most couples come to therapy six years later than is ideal, so the clean-up effort is difficult. Even still, it is worth a serious try. So go for it! Jump right in and give it all you have. Here are some things you can do to be a wise consumer of couples counseling.

3. Find a counselor with whom you feel comfortable. Interview three or four before you make a decision. (Specifically, read FAQ in the blog section at my website.) You are going to be taking a journey together. Choose someone you trust and then listen to them.

More from YourTango: True Love & The Bachelorette: Is This For Real?

4. Find out if your counselor has bias towards or against marriage. You will ultimately make the decision to stay in or leave your relationship, but you are going to be influenced by the biases of this person. So make sure you are choosing biases that fit with yours. Your counselor may have a big impact on this major life choice. Keep reading...

More couples counselor advice from YourTango:

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Dr. Bonnie Ray Kennan

Counselor/Therapist

Dr. Bonnie Kennan

Location: Torrance, CA
Credentials: CGP, EFT, LMFT, PsyD
Specialties: Couples/Marital Issues, Divorce/Divorce Prevention, Personality Disorders
Other Articles/News by Dr. Bonnie Ray Kennan:

My Holiday Gift To Men Everywhere

By

Dear wives and girlfriends, This fun and festive holiday season brings much promise. There will be parties, celebrations, and gift exchanges. Colorful trees, sweet and familiar melodies, and delicious food. It is a time to reconnect with family, friends, and that which is deeply meaningful. Beyond all of these external satisfactions, I want you to have ... Read more

True Love & The Bachelorette: Is This For Real?

By

Come on, admit it. You watched it; I know you did. This confession comes out in the privacy of my therapy office more than you can imagine. On Monday night you, along with so many others, curled up in front of the TV, grateful to have survived another Monday, and, popcorn in hand, watched the gut-wrenching saga of Des' and her final choice between Chris and ... Read more

Put On Your Rose-Colored Glasses

By

Save Valentine's Day By Putting On Your Rosé-Colored Glasses                                     By Dr. Bonnie Ray Kennan, MFT      Are you avoiding ... Read more

See More

Recent Expert Posts
Smooches

She's That Into You: Cracking the Code of Women

Women give off signals telling you how they feel.

Girlfriends

6 Texting Shockers You Must Avoid!

Sending your man a text message sounds easy enough, but get it wrong and it could be the end of you.

Blues

The addiction to "busy"ness: How to live with more intention

Is the daily routine of life getting you down? Find your passion and live a more authentic life!

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS