ProConnect

5 Steps To Get Your Man Back

By

5 Steps To Get Your Man Back
Confessions and insights from a man who gave a woman four chances.

First off, let me say that in all my years, there has never been an old girlfriend/wife that I’ve ever taken back, but one. My philosophy – tried it, it didn't work, move on. Then came my last girlfriend.  We met in the fall of 2007. I was enamored from the first sight. Yes, I thought she was physically attractive, but her inner beauty glowed brighter than ten suns. I fell in love.

 

More from YourTango: 6 Reasons Love Is Better After 50

I saw in her so much good, so much potential, so much love she gave to others. She inspired me to be a better person. We had many great times, but the true tests of a relationship are the times when our inner glow turns dark.

As I look back on why we broke up, sometimes it was situational (she was from another country and had via issues), other times it was personality traits (our own egos or baggage), and the last time, it was a relationship boundary that was crossed and finally ended the relationship. Reflecting on this experience gave me a lot of insight as to why we mended our relationship so many times; why it was diffrent from my other relationships. And it gave me insight into how a great relationship can be created.

Coupling my personal experience with information about men I’ve learned through my business - helping over a hundred men deal with the impacts of divorce (commonly the feelings of loss and wanting her back are discussed) - I’ve developed five steps to win your man back.

And to set the renewed relationship in the right direction, I’ll conclude with the four universal relationship truths needed for a strong, healthy relationship.

Five Steps to Win Your Man Back

More from YourTango: Leave Your Partner When Your Bank Account is Empty

Step 1: Be truthful to you. Do you really want him back, or are you trying to fill a self-worth void within you? Was he really good to you in the first place? Did he support you? Did he make you a better person? Did he inspire you? When fights occurred, was he respectful? Was he abusive in some way? If you can honestly answer this question “Yes, I want him back because he treated me well” then proceed to Step 2.

Step 2: Take resposibility. What caused the split? Was it a heavy moralistic lapse that cannot be salvaged (having an affair, stealing, lying) or was it more about harsh words that came out during the heat of the moment? Also, look how you contributed to the conflict or issue. Have you owned up to it? Are you working to change or improve that topic about you? If the reason for the split was due more to hot air than bad moral judgment, and you are working on making yourself a better person, proceed to Step 3.

Step 3: Is he forgiving? Look at his behavior? Does he show forgiveness in other areas of his life (rescue animals, volunteer, taken other old girlfriend back)? If he is someone that shows tendencies to forgive, proceed to Step 4.

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Recent Expert Posts
Smooches

She's That Into You: Cracking the Code of Women

Women give off signals telling you how they feel.

Girlfriends

6 Texting Shockers You Must Avoid!

Sending your man a text message sounds easy enough, but get it wrong and it could be the end of you.

Blues

The addiction to "busy"ness: How to live with more intention

Is the daily routine of life getting you down? Find your passion and live a more authentic life!

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

Resources
How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>
HOT STUFF!
FROM OUR PARTNERS