Got a crush on a co-worker?
As a dating coach, people come to my blog every day and ask me this question: "David, there's this great person that I want to date who works with me. How do I see if we might connect and still keep my job?"
Dating in the workplace is very tricky because you don't want to jeopardize either of your statuses in the company. You also don't want to create any bad blood between you and a fellow co-worker if it doesn't work out.
Now, I'm not saying it can't work. There are a lot of people who have fallen in love with co-workers. You just need to know how to approach it the right way, and how to "feel out" the situation to avoid putting either of you in a precarious situation. What Is Mobile Dating? Should I Try It?
Approaching a co-worker socially must be done somewhat differently — and more carefully — than approaching someone with whom you don't work. With that in mind, here are my six steps to determine whether (and, if so, how) to ask out your fellow co-worker:
1. The casual lunch. Start off by having lunch with him and a group of other people in the company cafeteria. Get to know him in a group setting with no pressure. This way, he gets to know you and what you're all about in a very casual way.
2. The group happy hour. Get a group of co-workers together and go out for happy hour one day after work. Now that you've already spent some time together, going to a happy hour is a great way to get to know each other outside of the work environment. Being outside the work environment will also give you the opportunity to do a bit of flirting with the interest. This will be a good way to see if he's also flirting with you.
3. The cool attitude. The key to liking someone at work is not to let them know it. You want to be able to casually get to know each other. During the happy hour, notice with which people they are hanging out most. Are they paying extra attention to you? Are they flirting with you? If so, then proceed to number four. Ladies, You Need To Watch Out For These Online Dating Red Flags
4. The playful text message. Text him one day and ask him what he's doing for lunch. Be playful and tell him that you really need to get out of the office, and that you couldn't think of anyone more fun with whom to have a lunch escape.
More dating advice from YourTango:
- 30 Bad Relationship Habits You *Desperately* Need To Lose By Age 30
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- The Secret To Successful Online Dating