Why Didn't He Call? How To Handle Rejection

young blonde woman waiting by the phone
Love, Self

There's nothing worse than being rejected after a great date.

One of the most common dating problems women face is wondering why he didn't call. You know, that great guy you had so much fun with and never heard from again? Men mysteriously disappear, and dating rejection can be jarring and feel really crummy.

Julie, one of my clients, faced this challenge. She connected with Bruce through a dating site. They exchanged emails and spoke on the phone. They met for coffee and chatted up a storm for over two hours. She told me it was obvious that Bruce was interested in her.

At the end of the date, Bruce asked Julie for a second date. The next week, they went skating. She said he was a total gentleman and that they both had a lot of fun. Unfortunately, at the end of the date, instead of asking her out again or even saying he would call her, Bruce suggested she call him "sometime" because "it would be fun to talk."

Julie was surprised by this proposition and didn't know what to make of it. After four days, Bruce still hadn't called her, and she asked me what I thought. 

She felt confused. How could a date go so well, and then, the guy just doesn't call? Julie wondered, "Does he expect me to call him?" With me as her dating coach, Julie is savvy enough to know that the last thing she should do is start pursuing him.

There are thousands of reasons why a man doesn't call a woman after a great date. But the bottom line is this — whatever the reason, the guy changed his mind. Let's get clear on how he communicated this. When you read between the lines of what Bruce said to Julie at the end of the second date, he told her he wouldn't be calling again.

He had already demonstrated that he knows how to pursue a woman, but after skating, he dropped the ball in her court, suggesting she call him. That was his way of saying "I'm no longer going to pursue you."

That doesn't mean he wants Julie to call him. Nope, he changed his mind and moved on. I know this is tough because every woman wants to know why. Julie wanted to know what happened or what she might have done wrong to turn him off. Keep reading ... 

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This article was originally published at Never Too Late. Reprinted with permission from the author.

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