Photo: Candice Picard | Unspash
How to stand out among the crowd.
By Amy North
Last updated on Dec 16, 2023
Few feelings compare to the one you get when you meet a man and feel a strong attraction to him. Maybe it’s his delicious good looks, or perhaps it’s his cool calming presence. Or maybe, it’s something that you can’t quite pinpoint just yet.
If you can’t help but consider him as a potential lover, then the first thing you’re going to want to do is to get him interested in you. While this sounds like quite the challenge, the good news is that it’s much easier than it sounds.
Here are 5 tiny ways to get, and keep, the guy that all the other women want:
1. Radiate happiness
If you’re looking to catch his eye then the best way to do so is by being the most positive person in the room. This means that no matter how terrible of a day you’ve had, or how much you dislike the rest of the crowd in the bar, radiate happiness because when you do, you’ll not only catch his eye but he’ll be drawn to you.
Just like you wouldn’t want to be with someone who was constantly down, angry, or bored with life, neither do guys. That’s why when you shine with positivity, men notice.
The best way to do so is by showing him that you have a full and cheerful life. Now, this can be tricky to do subtly, especially if you’re just getting to know the guy but to start casually mention an exciting plan or project you’re working on, or tell him about the epic adventure you had last weekend.
Simply put, you want to let him know that you have lots going on. Even if that isn’t necessarily the case, if you lead him to believe that you’re the ambitious go-getter type, the woman who is always up for a fun night out or trying something new, he’ll be intrigued by you.
If you want to get him interested, then take this a step further by making him laugh. When you can be the one who makes him laugh, you’ll be the one he wants to be around. So much so that it may even lead to a proper date!
Oh, and don’t forget to flash him your pearly whites, when you do your enthusiasm will send him over the edge!
2. Make him stare
There’s no denying that men tend to glance (perhaps a bit too long) in the direction of women who parade around in overly revealing tops or skin-tight bottoms, but believe me when I say that you don’t have to go to these lengths to catch his eye.
One of the easiest ways to make a man stare is by simply teasing him with a glimpse of the goods you got. Why? Because when you leave the rest to his imagination, it will take you much farther than showing too much, too soon.
Instead of showing all, dress to emphasize long stretches of skin that aren't usually associated with being sexy. For instance, try sleeveless or scooped collared shirts. A nice top, some bold accessories, great hair, and a touch of makeup with your fitted skirt will scream sexy and confident.
3. Show off your smarts
While not all guys are attracted to the same type of woman, two distinct characteristics will turn any man into mush: those who are sexy and smart. Again, this doesn’t mean that you should be sporting a mini skirt or reciting the table of elements, but rather it’s about having poise and caring about your appearance.
You may think that just because guys tend to talk about "hot girls" more than the "smart girls", that’s the kind of woman they want in their life. But, the truth is that men like women who can hold a conversation. So show him your big sexy brain, that’s what’ll get him going.
A great way to sound smart without coming across as a know-it-all is to become an expert in something you’re interested in. For instance, if music is your thing, then have some insightful opinions to share, or if you’re more into sports, then brush up on your knowledge and let him in on the latest news.
Being able to toss around random facts or heaps of knowledge will not only make you appear smart, but it’s also incredibly attractive.
Showing a man you have a passion for something will make him want to be with you because he’ll realize how dedicated you are to the things you enjoy. In other words, he will see that you aren’t waiting for a guy to step into your life to make you feel complete or satisfied, but rather that you’re just fine flying solo.
4. Be yourself
There isn’t anything sexy about a woman who is blatantly insecure or trying to be someone she’s not. Not to mention that guys are pretty aware when a woman is faking it. So, if you’re looking to get him interested in you, then it’s so important that you be yourself and shine with confidence.
To show a man that you’re a confident, independent woman there are many things you can do. Some of these take practice, whereas others can be done quickly.
For example, you can work on your body language, look him in the eyes when you speak to him, and focus on your posture. Or you can perfect your wardrobe so that you're always dressed to kill.
These may seem like insignificant or even pointless things to consider, but you’d be surprised how much of an impact they have when it comes to winning him over.
5. Show, don't tell
If you’re going to win him over, then you’re going to have to show him that you’re interested in him, and the best way to do so is by showing him, not telling him.
Any woman can tell a guy she thinks he’s cute and wants to get to know him better, but doing so won't evoke much emotion in him. However, by showing a man that you’re into him you’ll have much more luck winning him over.
To do so, simply ask him questions and listen when he talks. By giving him the spotlight he’ll not only appreciate the time you’re giving him, but it’ll also make him feel important and good about himself.
Those are the kinds of feelings men want to experience in a relationship. Just be sure that when he is talking, you don’t interrupt him or bring the story back to you. While it’s fine to comment on what he says (and you should), be careful not to monopolize the conversation.
After all, if you can make him feel like the prize you think he is, then he’ll most definitely want more of you in his life.
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Amy North is a blogger, relationship coach, and best-selling author. She has appeared in British Baker, Genetic Literacy Project, The Grocer, Adotas, Internewscast, and more.